إجازة الأستاذ أحمد لبن مدير المنتدى بقراءة الإمام عاصم الكوفي

She tries to make people happy
The Muslim woman is keen, in her conversations with other women, to bring happiness to them and make them feel cheerful and lively by means of the good news and pleasant jokes that she tells them. Making people happy, within the framework of that which is permitted, is an Islamic duty that is strongly encouraged, so that the environment of the believers, men and women, may be filled with friendliness, happiness and joy, ready to undertake serious work and the sacrifices and difficulties that it entails.

For this reason Islam tells us that the reward of one who makes Muslims happy will be the greater happiness that Allaah will bestow upon him on the Day of Resurrection: "Whoever meets his Muslim brother and makes him happy with something that Allaah likes, Allaah will make him happy on the Day of Resurrection."175

The clever Muslim woman will find different ways to make her sisters happy in ways that are permitted - a warm greeting, a kind word, a clever comment, a pleasant joke, good news, a friendly smile, a sincerely-meant visit, a charming gift, always keeping in touch, sincere help, comforting consolation - which will open their hearts, sow the seeds of love and strengthen the ties of friendship and sisterhood.

She is not over-strict
Another of the qualities of the true Muslim woman is that she is not over-strict, and does not go to extremes with regard to matters that Islam has permitted on certain occasions, such as the singing that is permitted on `Eed and at weddings, or watching some entertaining games or sports, so long as they are not accompanied by any form of corruption that may lead to fitnah.

Although she may accept to watch or join in entertainment on certain occasions, she does not make this her main concern in life. She follows the teachings of Islam which permit fun and entertainment on occasion, as is reported in a number of sahih Hadeeth.

In Sahih Bukhaari, `Aa’ishah (May Allaah be pleased with her) is reported to have arranged a marriage for a woman who was an orphan under her care, to a man of the Ansar. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, asked her: "O `Aa’ishah, what sort of fun and entertainment do you have? For the Ansar love fun and entertainment."176

Imam Bukhaari also narrates from `Aa’ishah: "The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, entered upon me when there were two young girls singing the songs of Bu`ath177. He lay down on his bed and turned his face away. Then Abu Bakr entered, and told me off, saying: `Musical instruments of Shaytan in the house of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam,!'

The Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, turned to him and said: `Let them be.' When he was no longer paying attention, I signalled to them, and they left."178 According to another report, also narrated by Bukhaari, the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "O Abu Bakr, every nation has a day of celebration, and this is our day of celebration."179

Another report narrated by Bukhaari from `Aa’ishah says: "It was the day of `Eed, and the black people were playing with shields and spears. Either I asked the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, or he said to me: `Would you like to watch?' I said, `Yes.' So he let me stand behind him, his cheek against my cheek, and he was saying, `Carry on, O Banu Arfidah180!' When I got tired, he asked me, `Have you had enough?' I said, `Yes.' He said, `Then go.'"181 Ibn Hijr reported a number of versions of this Hadeeth from `Aa’ishah, such as that recorded by al-Zuhri: ". . . Until I ['A'ishah] was the one who had had enough."182

Muslim also narrates from al-Zuhri: "Then he stayed standing there for my sake until I was the one who decided to leave."183 Al-Nisa'i reports from Yazid ibn Marwan: "The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: `Have you had enough? Have you had enough?' She said, `I decided to say No, just to see how where I stood with him (i.e. how much he loved me).'"184

Al-Nisa'i reports from Abu Salamah from `Aa’ishah: "I said, `O Messenger of Allaah, do not rush.' So he remained standing for my sake, then said, `Have you had enough?' I said, `Do not rush.' . . . It was not that I wanted to watch them, but I wanted all the women to know how I stood with him."

In the chapter on marriage, there is a report narrated by al-Zuhri which adds: "You should understand that young girls like to have fun."185 In Fath al-Bari186 al-Siraj reports via Abu'l-Zinad from `Urwah from `Aa’ishah that the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said on that day: "Let the Jews know that in our religion there is room for entertainment, and I have been sent with a tolerant, pure religion."

Tirmidhi reports in his Sunan that `Aa’ishah said: "The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, was sitting, and we heard some noise and children's voices outside. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, stood up, and saw an Abyssinian woman dancing, with children around her. He said, `O `Aa’ishah, come and see!' So I came, and put my chin on his shoulder, looking through the gap between his head and his shoulder. He asked me, `Have you had enough?' and I decided to say No, just to see where I stood with him. Suddenly `Umar appeared, and the people scattered. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: `I can see that the devils among jinn and mankind flee from `Umar!' [`Aa’ishah] said: then I went back."187.

These and similar texts, as understood in the books of Hadeeth, are clear evidence of the Prophet's kind and gentle treatment of his wife, and his eagerness to make her happy. They are also proof of the tolerance and ease of Islam, and its concern that women should be allowed to enjoy the kinds of fun and entertainment that it has permitted, unlike some of those overstrict people nowadays who regard such fun as a serious crime for which women should be severely punished by being imprisoned (in the home).

The Muslim woman who understands the teachings of Islam should be very serious in her attitude, concentrating on noble aims and shunning frivolities. But this should not stop her from having fun occasionally, in ways that are permitted by Islam, which leaves room for such entertainment. The wise Lawgiver understands the nature of people and their inclination to relax and have fun from time to time, so that they can then return refreshed to their serious pursuits, with renewed vigour, stronger determination, and more prepared to shoulder the burdens of their responsibilities. This is the balanced, integrated, wise approach that Islam brings.

She is not arrogant or proud
The true Muslim woman is not arrogant or proud; she does not look down her nose at other women who may be inferior to her in terms of beauty, wealth, lineage or status, because the Muslim woman who understands the teachings of Islam knows that arrogance and pride in this world will deny a woman the blessings of the Hereafter, which Allaah will deny to men and women who are arrogant. These blessings are only for those who shun arrogance and pride in world: “That House of the Hereafter We shall give to those who intend not highhandedness or mischief on earth: and the End is [best] for the righteous.” [Quran 28:83]

She also knows that Allaah does not love those who arrogantly boast: “And swell not your cheek [for pride] at men, nor walk in insolence through the earth: for Allaah loves not any arrogant boaster.” [Quran 31:18]

Whoever examines the Hadeeth texts will be astonished at the attention given by the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, to eradicating arrogance from people's hearts by forbidding it, deterring it and warning those men and women who were afflicted with it that they stand to lose everything in the Hereafter for the sake of an atom's-weight of pride that the Shaytan has placed in their hearts. Such people are among the arrogant ones to whom Allaah has denied entry to Paradise, as is stated in the Hadeeth narrated by Muslim: "No one will enter Paradise who has an atom's-weight of pride in his heart." A man asked, "What if a man likes his clothes and his shoes to look good?" He said, "Allaah is Beautiful and loves beauty (i.e. wanting to loogood is not pride or arrogance). Pride is denying the truth and despising people."188

Harithah ibn Wahb may Allaah be pleased with him said: "I heard the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, say: `Shall I not tell you about the people of Hell? Everyone who is harsh, proud, disdainful and arrogant."189

It is enough for those arrogant, proud women who boast to their friends to know of the moral humiliation that Allaah has prepared for them in the Hereafter: Allaah will not even look at them or speak to them or praise them, and this will be the ultimate humiliation. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "On the Day of Resurrection, Allaah will not look at those who let their garments trail on the ground out of arrogance."190

"There are three whom Allaah will not speak to, or praise, or look at on the Day of Judgement, and they will have a severe punishment: an old man who commits adultery, a king who tells lies, and a poor man who is arrogant."191

Pride is one of the divine attributes and weak human creatures have no right to it. Those who are arrogant and proud transgress into the realm of the divine, vying with the Almighty Creator for one of His sublime attributes, so they deserve the severe punishment to which the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, referred: "Allaah says: `Might is My cloak and pride is My garment. Whoever vies with Me for either of them, I will punish him.'"192

Many Hadeeth warn the believers against being tempted by pride at moments of human weakness. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used various methods to warn them so that the pious believers would be protected from the awful disease of arrogance. For example: "Whoever thinks highly of himself, or walks with an arrogant attitude, will meet Allaah when He is angry with him."193

She is humble and modest
It comes as no surprise that the Muslim woman who understands anything of the teachings of Islam should be humble and modest, gentle, tolerant and kind in her dealings with others. She finds Hadeeth which complement those that warn men and women against arrogance, texts that encourage modesty and humility, promising everyone who humbles himself for the sake of Allaah that he or she will be raised in status, as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said in the Hadeeth narrated by Muslim: "No one is humble for the sake of Allaah, but Allaah will raise him in status."194 Allaah told me that you should be so humble towards one another that no one should boast to anyone else and no one should oppress anyone."195

The Muslim woman who studies the life of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, will find in his sublime character a unique, living example of modesty, humility, gentleness, genuineness, noble attitudes and tolerance. Whenever he passed a group of boys playing, he would stop and greet them, joking naturally with them. His high status as Prophet and leader of the ummah did not prevent him from being spontaneous and natural with others.

Anas may Allaah be pleased with him said that he passed by a group of children and greeted them. He added, "The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to do that."196 Anas may Allaah be pleased with him gave another account of the Prophet's humility: he reported that one of the slave-women of Madinah used to take the Prophet's hand and lead him about wherever she wanted, until he had sorted out her needs.197

Tamim ibn Usayd came to Madinah to ask about the rules of Islam. He was a stranger, but he did not find any barrier or guard between him and the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, the first men in the Islamic state, who was on the minbar addressing the people. Tamim came forward to ask some questions, and the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, welcomed him with all warmth, humility and compassion. Tamim tells the story, as was related by Imam Muslim: "I came to the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, whilst he was giving a speech. I said, `O Messenger of Allaah, a stranger has come to ask about his religion; he does not know what his religion is.' The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, welcomed me, interrupted his speech, and came to me. A chair was brought for him, so he sat down and began to teach me from what Allaah had taught him. Then he resumed his speech and finished what he had been saying."198

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to instil the attitude of humility, based on tolerance, gentleness and a good nature, in the hearts of his Companions. He, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "If I were to be invited to a simple meal of a sheep's foot or leg, or if I were to be offered this food as a gift, I would accept."199 This is modesty in its purest form and human greatness of the highest degree.

She is moderate with regard to her clothing and appearance
The Muslim woman who understands the teachings of Islam adheres to the principle of modesty in all things, and especially in the way she dresses and looks. She is keen to look good, but without any extravagance, excess or conceit. She does not blindly follow those who throw aside new clothes after wearing them only once and exhaust themselves trying to keep up with the latest fashion, which is forever changing, as is the habit of some foolish, ignorant women who have nothing better to do. On the other hand, she does not neglect her clothes or appearance, and she tries to look good in moderation. She abides by the limits of moderation set out in the Quran, which describes moderation as one of the qualities of the believing servants of Allaah, men and women alike: “Those who, when they spend, are not extravagant and not niggardly, but hold a just [balance] between those [extremes].” [Quran 25:67]

The Muslim woman is careful not to fall victim to the enslavement of fashion and those behind it, who are people who have no fear of Allaah and do not have the best interests of women - especially Muslim women - at heart. She is careful to avoid this enslavement which the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, warned against and told us that it is a source of great misery: "Wretched is the slave of the dinar, dirham and fancy clothes of velvet and silk! If he is given, he is pleased, and if he is not given, he is displeased."200

The Muslim woman is protected by the teachings of Islam from falling into the error of arrogance or conceit regarding her appearance, and other deeds which may lead to a person's downfall, as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "There was a man who walked with pride because of his fine cloak and because he was pleased with himself. Allaah caused him to sink in the earth, and he will go on sinking into it until the Day of Resurrection."201

The Muslim woman uses means of adornment that are within the limits of what is permitted by Islam. She wears elegant, expensive clothes, which are among the good things permitted by Allaah, without going to extremes of excess. This is the moderation advocated and encouraged by Islam, and there is a huge difference between the wise, moderate woman, and the foolish, emptyheaded woman who goes to extremes.

The Muslim woman avoids both extremes with regard to her dress and appearance. She does not exaggerate or go to extreme limits of excess, neither does she neglect her clothes and appearance to the poiof appearing to be miserly or ascetic, thinking that this asceticism is a form of worship that will earn her the pleasure of Allaah.
The woman who wears beautiful clothes to show off in front of her friends is a sinner, because Allaah does not love every arrogant boaster. But the one who wears beautiful clothes to display the bounty of Allaah and seeking His help, is an obedient servant who will be rewarded.

The one who neglects her appearance out of stinginess enjoys no position of respect among people, and will have no reward from Allaah. The one who neglects her appearance out of an attitude of other-worldliness, thinking that she is worshipping Allaah by denying herself what is permitted, is also a sinner, as Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah, may Allaah have mercy on him, said.202 The essence of a woman's happiness in this world and the next is purposefulness, moderation and balance. This is the attitude of the Muslim woman who understands and adheres to the teachings of Islam. So her clothes are clean, beautiful, neat and suited to the Muslim woman, demonstrating Allaah's blessings to her without going to the extreme of showing off.

She loves noble thinand always aims high
The Muslim woman who understands the teachings of Islam is concerned only with noble matters, and shuns those trivial, cheap matters that do not deserve the attention of the serious, refined person. She builds her relationships with other women on this basis of high concerns and noble aims. She has no room in her life for making friends with foolish, empty-headed prattlers or for keeping busy with trivial matters. She has no time to spend on idle talk and foolish issues. This is what Allaah loves to see in His believing servants, men and women, as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "Allaah is noble (karim) and loves noble people. He loves noble things and hates foolishness."203

She is concerned about the affairs of the Muslims
The Muslim woman who truly understands the teachings of Islam is not concerned only with her own household, husband and children; she takes an interest in the affairs of the Muslims in general. By doing so she is following the guidance of Islam which counts all Muslims as a single brotherhood, and compares them, because of their mutual love, affection and compassion, to a single body: if one part of it suffers, the rest of the body will stay awake in pain.204 Islam also likens the believers to a solid structure, in which some bricks support others.205

The modern Muslim woman's concern for Muslim individuals, families, societies and the ummah as a whole, stems from her Islamic character, her adherence to the teachings of Islam, her Islamic world-view, and her sense of the responsibilities that Islam has given to every Muslim man and woman to convey and expound its teachings. Islamic history is filled with many examples of virtuous women who were renowned for their concern about the Muslims, men and women. One example is the report given by Imam Muslim from Salim, the freed slave of Shaddad, who said: "I entered upon `Aa’ishah, the wife of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, on the day that Sa`d ibn Abi Waqqas died. `Abd al-Rahman ibn Abi Bakr also came in, and performed wudu' in `Aa’ishah's presence. She said, `O `Abd al-Rahman! Perform your wudu' properly, as I heard the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, say: "Woe to the heels because of Hell-fire."'"206

`Aa’ishah noticed that her brother `Abd al-Rahman had not washed his heels properly in wudu', and she did not keep silent about what she had seen. She reminded him that it was essential to perform wudu' properly, as she had heard from the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam. This is an example of the kind of commendable concern that is the duty of every Muslim man and woman whenever there is a need to enjoin what is good or forbid what is evil.

When `Umar ibn al-Khattab may Allaah be pleased with him was stabbed, and he felt that death was near, he told his son `Abdullaah: "Go to `Aa’ishah, say salam to her, and ask her permission for me to be buried in her house alongside the Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, and Abu Bakr. So `Abdullaah came to her and conveyed this message. She said, "Certainly, he is most welcome." Then she said: "O my son, convey my salam to `Umar, and tell him: Do not leave the ummah of Muhammad without a protector. Appoint a successor to take care of them. Do not leave them untended after your death, for I fear fitnah for them."207

This was a far-sighted, common-sense attitude of concern for the ummah, that they should not be left without a leader to govern their affairs and maintain their unity and security.

In these words of `Aa’ishah (May Allaah be pleased with her), the modern Muslim woman has a prime example which will help her to understand the essence of Islam, her responsibilities towards her religion and her ummah, and the importance of being concerned about the affairs of the Muslims. This will give her insight and understanding that will enable her to undertake her duties of contributing to the revival of Islam and calling Muslim men and women to return to the position of being the Best of Peoples evolved for mankind, as Allaah wants them to be.

She honours her guest
The true Muslim woman is happy to welcome guests, and hastens to honour them, in response to the call of faith in Allaah and the Last Day, as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "Whoever believes in Allaah and the Last Day, let him honour his guest."208

The Muslim woman who honours her guest thus confirms that she is a believer in Allaah and the Last Day. Therefore this honouring of the guest is called a reward that is given to the guest as if thanking him for the opportunity he has given to his host to do a good deed, put his faith into practice, and please Allaah: "`Whoever believes in Allaah and the Last Day, let him honour his guest by giving him his reward.' They asked, `What is his reward, O Messenger of Allaah?' He said: `One day and one night. The right of hospitality is three days, and anything beyond that is an act of charity.'"209

Honouring guests is regarded in Islam as a great deed which is encouraged, and for which the sincere Muslim woman will be rewarded. But Islam regulated it and set limits for it. The "reward" of the guest is one day and one night, then comes the duty of hospitality, which is three days. Anything beyond that is an act of charity which will be recorded among the good deeds of the hospitable, generous woman.

In Islam, honouring the guest is not a matter of choice to be followed or not according to one's mood or personal feelings. It is a duty on the Muslim, man or woman, who must hasten to fulfil this duty as soon as a guest knocks on the door or enters one's yard: "Accommodating a guest for one night is an absolute duty on every Muslim.

Whoever gets up in the morning and finds a guest waiting in his yard has a duty to fulfil, and it is up to him what he will do about it."210

Those who do not like to receive a guest and close their doors to him are not good people, as is stated in the Hadeeth reported by Imam Ahmad, in which the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "There is no goodness in the one who is not hospitable."211

Islam has made hospitality the duty of every Muslim man and woman, and considers it to be the guest's right. No Muslim should fall short in carrying out this duty. If a spirit of miserliness has overtaken a people to the extent that they deny their guest his right, then Islam permits the guest to take his right from them. This is seen in the Hadeeth narrated by Bukhaari, Muslim and others from `Uqbah ibn `Amir, who said: "I said, `O Messenger of Allaah, you are sending us to people who do not feed us. What do you think about this?' He said,

`If you go to a people and they order that something appropriate be brought (i.e., food and drink), then accept it, and if they do not do that, then take the things you as a guest are entitled to, that they should have provided.'"212

Hospitality is a basic Islamic attitude, so you will never find a Muslim woman whose Islam is genuine being stingy to her guest, no matter what her or her husband's cir.

Islam has taught her that the food of two people will feed three, and that the food of three will feed four. So she need never worry about an unexpected guest knocking suddenly at her door. Abu Hurayrah may Allaah be pleased with him said: "The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: `The food of two people is enough for three, and the food of three is enough for four.'"213

Jabir may Allaah be pleased with him said: "I heard the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, say: `The food of one is enough for two, the food of two is enough for four, and the food of four is enough for eight."214

The Muslim woman whose personality has been cleansed and moulded by Islam does not worry about there being too many people at the table, unlike the Western woman who does not receive a guest for whom she has not prepared food in advance. The Muslim woman welcomes her guests even if the visit is unannounced, and invites them to share her family's food, no matter that her own share may be reduced by a few mouthfuls. The true Muslim woman prefers hunger to ignoring the rights of this guest, whom Allaah and His Messenger have commanded her to honour. Indeed, Allaah will bless the food of one so that it will become enough for two, and He will bless the food of two so that it will become enough for four, and so on. There is no neefor that dryness and inhospitability from which Western-influenced materialistic people are suffering in both East and West.

The righteous salaf set the highest example of honouring one's guest, so much so that Allaah Himself commended the way in which some of them honoured their guests. An example of this is the Hadeeth narrated by Bukhaari and Muslim from Abu Hurayrah may Allaah be pleased with him. A man came to the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, and he sent word to his wives (to prepare food). They said, "We have nothing but water." So the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said, "Who will play host to this man?" One of the Ansar said: "I will." So he took the man to his wife and told her: "Honour the guest of the Messenger of Allaah." She said, "We do not have anything but the boys' food." He said, "Prepare the food, light the lamp, and put the boys to sleep if they want some supper."

So she prepared the food, lit the lamp, and put the boys to sleep. Then she got up as if to adjust the lamp, but she extinguished it. The couple pretended to eat (with their guest), but in fact they went to bed hungry. The next morning, the Ansari went to the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, who told him: "Allaah has commended what you two did last night." Allaah revealed: “. . . But [they] give them preference over themselves, even though poverty was their [own lot]. And those saved from the covetousness of their own souls – they are the ones that achieve prosperity.” [Quran 59:9] 215

The Muslim woman is generous and hospitable, she welcomes guests no matter when they arrive, and never worries about the sudden arrival of guests. In this way she provides the best help to enable her husband to be generous and hospitable like her, welcoming guests and hastening to honour them with a cheerful, smiling face, as the poet216 said: "I smile at my guest and make him smile before he brings in his luggage, as if I had plenty to offer him at the time when I am suffering hardship.

Hospitality does not consist of piling up food in front of him; the face of the generous man is the essence of hospitality."

She prefers others over herself
The true Muslim woman prefers others over herself, even if she is poor and does not have much, because Islam teaches its followers to do so. This selflessness is a basic characteristic of the true Muslim, which distinguishes him or her from other people.

The Ansar, (may Allaah be pleased with them), were the first pioneers in selflessness after the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, himself. A verse of the Quran was revealed commending their unique selflessness, which would remain for all time a shining example to humanity of how generosity and selflessness should be. They welcomed their Muhajir brothers, who had nothing, and gave them everything: “But those who before them, had homes [in Madinah] and had adopted the Faith - show their affection to such as came to them for refuge, and entertain no desire in their hearts for things given to the [latter], but give them preference over themselves, even though poverty was their [own lot]. And those saved from the covetousness of their own souls - they are the ones that achieve prosperity.” [Quran 59:9]

The life of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, abounded with selflessness, and he also instilled this attitude in the hearts of the first Muslims. Sahl ibn Sa`d may Allaah be pleased with him reported: "A woman brought a woven garment (burdah) and said, `I wove it with my own hands for you to wear.' The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, took it, as he needed it. He came out to us, wearing it wrapped around his waist. So-and-so said, `Give it to me, how nice it is!' The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said, `Of course.' The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, was sitting in a gathering, and when he came, back, he folded up the burdah and sent it to that man. The people told the man: `You should not have done that. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, wore it because he needed it, then you asked for it and you knew that he does not refuse requests.' He said, `I did not ask for it so that I could wear it. I asked for it so that it could be my shroud.'" Sahl said: "And (later on) it was his shroud."217

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to feel happy whenever he saw his teaching of selflessness bearing fruits in the Muslims' lives when there was some crisis such as drought or famine. This is seen in his words: "When a number of their men are killed in battle, or they do not have enough food for their children, the Ash`aris [a tribe] gather whatever they have in one cloth and share it out equally.

They belong to me and I belong to them."218 How beautiful is the attitude of selflessness that we learn about from the Ansar, the Ash`aris and others like them! How great is the virtue of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, who implanted this attitude in the hearts of the first generation of Muslim men and women, from whom successive generations of Muslims inherited it until it became a basic characteristic of the Islamic society.

She checks her customs and habits against Islamic standards
The Muslim woman who has insight into the rulings of Islam does not accept every tradition and custom that is widely accepted by others, for there may be customs that are derived from ancient or modern jahili traditions which go against Islam. These are unacceptable to the Muslim woman, even if everybody else accepts them unanimously.

The Muslim woman does not decorate her house with statues or pictures (of animate objects), neither does she keep a dog at home, unless it is a guard dog, because the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, has forbidden all of that. The sahih Hadeeth on this matter are very emphatic in their prohibition, and there is no room for prevarication or excuses: Ibn `Umar may Allaah be pleased with him reported that the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "Those who make these images will be punished on the Day of Resurrection and will be told: `Give life to that which you have created.'"219 `Aa’ishah (May Allaah be pleased with her) said: "The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, returned from a journey, and I had covered a small window with a curtain that had images on it. When the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, saw it, his face changed colour (with anger) and he said, `O `Aa’ishah! Those who will be the most severely punished by Allaah on the Day of Resurrection will be those who imitated the creation of Allaah .' She said: So we cut it up and made one or two pillows from it."220

Ibn `Abbas, may Allaah be pleased with him, said: "I heard the Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, say: `Every maker of images will be in the Fire; every image that he made will be brought to life and will punish him in Hell." Ibn `Abbas, may Allaah be pleased with him, said: "So if you must do that, make pictures of trees and inanimate objects."221

Abu Talhah may Allaah be pleased with him said that the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "The angels do not enter a house in which there is a dog or an image."222 `Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said: "Jibril (may Allaah exalt his mention) promised to come to the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, at a certain time. That time came and went, and hedid not come. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, was holding a stick in his hand, which he threw aside, saying, `Allaah does not break His promise and neither do His Messengers.' Then he turned around and saw a puppy underneath his bed. He said, `When did this dog get in?' I said, `By Allaah, I did not even notice it.' He gave orders that it should be taken out, and it was removed. Then Jibril (may Allaah exalt his mention) came to him, and the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said, `You promised to come and I was waiting for you, but you did not come.'

He said, `The dog that was in your house prevented me. We do not enter a house where there is a dog or an image.'"223

There are many Hadeeth which prohibit pictures and statues, and the wisdom behind this prohibition is apparent especially nowadays when hypocrites, sycophants and those possessed by greed and ambition encourage tyrants in their oppression. One of their favoured methods is to erect statues to them, both during their lifetimes and after their deaths, thus turning them into gods and demigods seated on thrones of glory, whipping the backs of the oppressed. Islam brought the doctrine of Tawhid, and destroyed the statues of shirk and jahiliyyah fifteen hundred years ago. It will not permit these graven images to come back into the lives of Muslim men and women, whether it be in the name of commemorating a leader, honouring aartist or glorifying a scientist, poet or writer. The Islamic society is a monotheistic society where glorification, sanctification and veneration are only for Allaah. So there is no room in the Islamic society for these statues and images.

As far as keeping a dog is concerned, there is nothing wrong with that if the dog is kept for hunting or farming purposes, as in the Hadeeth of Ibn `Umar may Allaah be pleased with him, who said: "I heard the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, say: `Whoever keeps a dog, unless it is a dog for hunting or herding livestock, his reward will decrease by two qirats every day.'"224

Keeping dogs in the house after the Western fashion, spoiling them, manufacturing special food and shampoo for them, setting up "beauty parlours" for them and all the other things on which people in the West and the U.S. spend millions upon millions of dollars annually. . . All of this has nothing whatsoever to do with Islam and its tolerant customs. The psychological state of Westerners, and the dry, materialistic life they lead, had driven them to these extremes in caring for their dogs, to compensate for the lack of human love in their social lives. But the social life of Islam is filled with human emotion, so Muslims have no need to go to such absurd extremes.225

The Muslim woman who understands the teachings of Islam does not eat or drink from vessels of gold or silver, no matter how rich she may be or how luxurious a life she may enjoy, because to do so is haram according to Islam. We find this prohibition in a number of definitive, sahih Hadeeth. Umm Salamah (May Allaah be pleased with her) reported that the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "Whoever drinks from a vessel of silver, it is as if he is throwing Hell-fire into his stomach."226

According to a report given by Muslim, the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "Whoever eats or drinks from vessels of gold or silver" - (in another report: whoever drinks from a vessel of gold or silver) - " it is as if he is throwing fire from Hell into his stomach."227 The alert Muslim woman, no matter where she lives, examines every custom that is followed in her society and measures it against the rulings, values and principles of Islam. Whatever is compatible with Islam, she accepts, but whatever contradicts Islam, she rejects outright, whether it is a custom relating to betrothal and marriage, or in family or social life. What matters is whether the custom is compatible with Islam, not how widely it is spread among people.

She follows Islamic manners in the way she eats and drinks
The alert Muslim woman is distinguished by her keenness to follow Islamic etiquette in the way she eats and drinks. If you were to see her at the table eating food, or if you saw the way she sets the table, you would know her by the Islamic manners that she has adopted in the way she eats, drinks and sets the table. She does not begin to eat until she has mentioned the name of Allaah, and she eats with her right hand from the food directly in front of her 228, according to the teaching of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam: "Mention the name of Allaah , eat with your right hand, and eat from what is directly in front of you."229

If she forgets to mention the name of Allaah at the beginning of her meal, she will rectify that by saying: "Bismillahi awwalahu wa akhirahu (in the name of Allaah at its beginning and at its end)," as is taught in the Hadeeth narrated by `Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her): "The Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: `Whenever any of you eats, let him mention the name of Allaah , may He be glorified. If he forgets to mention the name of Allaah at the beginning, let him say "Bismillahi awwalahu wa akhirahu."'"230

The second issue is eating with the right hand. The Muslim woman who is acting according to Islamic manners eats and drinks with her right hand. The commandment to eat with the right hand, and the prohibition of eating with the left hand, are clearly reported in numerous Hadeeth, for example: "When any one of you eats, let him eat with his right hand, and if he drinks, let him drink with his right hand, for the Shaytan eats with his left hand and drinks with his left hand."231

"None of you should eat with his left hand or drink with his left hand, for the Shaytan eats with his left hand and drinks with his left hand." Nafi` added that the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "Do not give or take with it (the left hand)."232

If the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, saw anyone eating with his left hand, he would tell him to stop, and would teach him the proper manners. If the person arrogantly persisted, he would rebuke him more sternly and pray against him.

Salamah ibn al-Akwa`may Allaah be pleased with him said that a man ate with his left hand in the presence of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam. He said, "Eat with your right hand." The man said, "I cannot." He said, "May you never be able to use it!" The only thing that stopped him was arrogance, and he never raised his right hand to his mouth after that.233

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, always liked to start things from the right, and he encouraged others to do likewise. Bukhaari, Muslim and Malik report from Anas that the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, was given some milk that had been mixed with water from the well. There was a Bedouin sitting on his right, and Abu Bakr al-Siddiq was sitting on his left. He drank some of the milk, then he passed it to the Bedouin and said: "Start on the right and pass to the right."234

On one occasion, he asked a young boy235 seated on his right to give up his turn for some elders, but the boy insisted on taking his turn and obtaining barakah (blessing) from the left-over of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, and the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, did not criticize or rebuke him for doing so. Suhayl ibn Sa`d may Allaah be pleased with him described the incident: "The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, was given something to drink, and he drank some of it. There was a young boy on his right, and some old men on his left. He asked the boy, `Will you let me give some to these men?' The boy said, `No, by Allaah, I will not give up my share from you to anyone.' So the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, put it in his hand."236

There are many such reports and texts that definitively show that using the right hand is an important aspect of Islamic manners, which the true Muslim adopts readily and does not try to find excuses. This is what the Sahabah and Tabi`in used to do, without exception. When `Umar ibn al-Khattab may Allaah be pleased with him was the khalifah, he used to patrol the city himself and check up on the people.

Once, he saw a man eating with his left hand, so he told him, "O servant of Allaah, eat with your right hand." He saw him a second time eating with his left hand, so he hit him with his whip and said, "O servant of Allaah, eat with your right hand." He saw him a third time eating with his left h, so he hit him with his whip and said angrily, "O servant of Allaah, your right hand!" The man replied, "O Amir al-Mu'minin, it is busy." `Umar said, "What is keeping it busy?" He said, "The day of Mu'tah237."

`Umar began to weep, and came to the man apologizing and consoling him. He asked him, "Who helps you make wudu`? Who helps you with what you need?" Then he ordered that the man should be treated fairly and taken care of. Umar's concern for this aspect of the conduct of one of the people demonstrates the importance of this apparently minor issue. It is indicative of the Muslim's personality and unique identity. `Umar was very keen to apply this rule to the Muslims, so he did not allow them to take it lightly or ignore it.

I would like to address this to those Muslim ladies who have adopted Western table manners which dictate that the fork should be held in the left hand, and the knife in the right, so that the food is cut with the right hand and placed in the mouth with the left. These people follow this practice without adjusting it, so that they are eating with their left hands, contradictory to the teachings of their religion. They do not bother to move the fork to the right hand and the knife to the left, so that they may eat with their right hand, because they do not want to change this Western "etiquette." This is just one example of the moral defeat from which our ummah is suffering at the hands of m, which we are following slavishly without adjusting or adapting foreign customs to suit our own identity, religion and values. The true Muslim should be the furthest removed from such blind, ignorant imitation.

The true Muslim woman who is proud of her religion and its noble guidance in all aspects of life insists on eating with her right hand and calls on others to do likewise.

She is not ashamed to announce it in gatherings where people still adhere slavishly to practices that have come from the West, so that she may explain it to those men and women who are ignorant and careless, and bring them back to their senses. Then they will follow the sunnah and eat and drink with their right hands. With regard to the third issue, eating from what is nearest to one, this is in accordance with the Islamic manners of eating. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, clearly commanded this, along with mentioning the name of Allaah and eating with the right hand. It is recorded in numerous Hadeeth, such as the report of `Umar ibn Abi Salamah may Allaah be pleased with him, who said: "I was a young boy under the care of the Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam. My hand used to wander all over the plate, so the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, told me: `O young boy, mention the name of Allaah , eat with your right hand, and eat from what is directly in front of you.'"238

When the Muslim woman eats with her hand, she does so in a nice, good-mannered fashion, as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to do. He used to eat with just three fingers; he did not plunge his whole hand into the food in a way that would put others off. This was reported by Ka`b ibn Malik: "I saw the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, eating with three fingers, and when he had finished he would lick them."239

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, commanded people to lick their fingers and clean their plates, as Jabir may Allaah be pleased with him reported that he said: "You do not know where in the food is the blessing."240

Anas may Allaah be pleased with him said: "When the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, ate, he would lick his three fingers. He said: `If any of you drops a mouthful, let him pick it up, remove the dirt, and eat it, and not leave it for the Shaytan.' He commanded us to clean our plates and said: `You do not know in which part of your food is the blessing.'"241

Besides seeking the blessing in the food, this Prophetic teaching also encourages Muslims to clean their hands and their plates. Cleaning them of whatever food is left befits the person who is clean and well mannered, and is indicative of his or her sensitivity and good taste. The West has now adopted this good practice which was commanded by the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, fifteen hundred years ago: nowadays the Europeans clear their plates and do not leave anything. Of course, the sensitive, well-mannered Muslim woman does not eat noisily, making disgusting sounds, nor does she take large mouthfuls such as would cause her to make a revolting spectacle of herself.

When she has finished eating, she praises Allaah as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, taught us to do, thanking Allaah for His blessing and seeking the reward of those who give praise and thanks. Abu Umamah may Allaah be pleased with him said that when the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, finished his meal, he would say: "Al-hamdu lillahi kathiran tayyiban mubarakan fihi, ghayra makfiyyin wa la muwadda`in wa la mustaghnan `anhu, rabbana (Praise be to Allaah, much good and blessed praise. O our Lord, we cannot compensate Your favour, nor leave it nor dispense with it)."242

Mu`adh ibn Anas, may Allaah be pleased with him, said: "The Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: `Whoever eats a meal then says Al-hamdu lillahi alladhi at`amani hadha wa razaqanihi min ghayri hawlin minni wa la quwwatin (Praise be to Allaah Who fed me and bestowed this provision upon me with no power or ability on my part)', will be forgiven for the sins committed prior to it."243 The well-mannered Muslim woman does not criticize food, no matter what it is,

following the teaching and example of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam. Abu Hurayrah may Allaah be pleased with him said: "The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, never criticized food. If he liked it, he ate it, and if he did not like it, he left it."244

The Muslim woman's manners with regard to drinking are also derived from the teachings of Islam, which impart good manners to man in every aspect of life. After mentioning the name of Allaah, she drinks in two or three draughts. She does not breathe into the cup, nor does she drink from the mouth of the jug or bottle if she can help it. She should not breathe into her drink, and she should drink sitting down if she can. Drinking in two or three draughts is what the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to do, as Anas may Allaah be pleased with him reported: "The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to breathe three times 245 when drinking."246

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, discouraged drinking in one draught: "Do not drink in one draught like camels do; drink in two or three. Mention the name of Allaah when you drink, and give praise to Him when you finish drinking."247 The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, forbade blowing into one's drink, as is mentioned in the Hadeeth of Abu Sa`id al-Khudri: "A man said, `I see some dirt in it.' The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said, `Then pour it out.' He said, `One draught is not enough for me.' The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said, `Take the cup away from your mouth, then take a breath.'"248

The Hadeeth on the manners of drinking make it clear that it is better for the well-mannered Muslim woman to avoid drinking from the mouth of the bottle or jug if she can, and to drink sitting down if possible. This is preferable, but drinking from the mouth of the jug or while standing are permitted, because the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, did so on occasion.

Spreading the greeting of Islam
One of the distinctive aspects of the Muslim woman's social conduct is her insistence on the greeting of Islam, which she gives to every Muslim man and woman she meets, in accordance with the rules of giving salam outlined by Islam, which command us to spread salam in a number of ayat and Hadeeth.

In Islam, greeting with salam is a clearly defined etiquette which has been commanded by Almighty Allaah in His Book, and rules and regulations concerning this greeting have been set out in numerous Hadeeth to which the scholars of Hadeeth devoted entire chapters called kitab alsalam or bab al-salam. Allaah commanded the Muslims to greet one another with salam in clear, definitive terms in the Quran: “O you who believe! Enter not houses other than your own, until you have asked permission and saluted those in them . . .” [Quran 24:27]

Allaah commanded the Muslims to return the greeting with something similar or something better, hence it is an obligation on the one who hears a greeting to return it, and not to ignore it: “When a [courteous] greeting is offyou, meet it with a greeting still more courteous, or [at least] of equal courtesy . . .” [Quran 4:86]

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, strongly encouraged the Muslims to spread salam and to greet those they know and those they do not know. `Abdullaah ibn `Amr ibn al-`As may Allaah be pleased with him said: "A man asked the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, `Which type of Islam is the best?' He said, `To feed people, and to say salam to those you know and those you do not know.'"249

Greeting with salam is one of the seven things which the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, commanded his Companions, and the Muslim ummah after them, to adhere to. They were listed by al-Bara' ibn `Azib may Allaah be pleased with him: "The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, commanded us to do seven things: to visit the sick, to attend funerals, to bless someone when he sneezes, to support the weak, to help the one who is oppressed, to spread salam, and to help people fulfil their oaths."250

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, placed great emphasis on salam and encouraged Muslims to use this greeting in many Hadeeth, because he understood its effects in spreading brotherly love and strengthening the ties of love, closeness and friendship between individuals and groups. He described it as something which would lead to love, and love would lead to faith, and faith would lead to Paradise: "By the One in Whose hand is my soul, you will not enter Paradise until you believe, and you will not believe until you love one another. Shall I not tell you of something which if you do it, you will love one another? Spread salam amongst yourselves."251

He, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, also said that the one who initiated the greeting would be closer to Allaah and more deserving of His pleasure, favour and blessing: "The closest of the people to Allaah is the one who starts the greeting of salam."252

`Abdullaah ibn `Umar may Allaah be pleased with him used to go to the market in the morning, and he did not pass by anybody without saying salam to him. One day he was asked, "What do you do in the market, when you do not sell anything, or ask about prices, or haggle, or join any gatherings?" He said, "We go there in the morning for the purpose of saying salam to whoever we meet."253

In Islam, greeting with salam is not considered to be the matter of a social custom defined by men, that may be changed and adapted according to time and circumstances. Greeting with salam is a clearly-defined etiquette which has been commanded by Almighty Allaah in His Book, and rules and regulations concerning this greeting have been set out, as described above. There is only one form of the greeting, to which Muslim men and women who are aware of Islamic manners and are keen to apply Islamic teachings adhere. It is: "al-salamu `alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu (peace be upon you, and the mercy and blessings of Allaah)." The man or woman who is initiating the greeting says it like this - in the plural form - even if he or she is greeting only one person. The man or woman thus addressed responds: "wa`alaykum al-salam wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu."254

The Muslim woman who is keen to be distinguished by her Islamic identity adheres to this blessed form of greeting, which is the original greeting of Islam, and does not substitute any other kind of greeting. This correct Islamic greeting should not be replaced by other greetings, such as the old-fashioned Arabic greeting "`im sabahan," or modern greetings such as "sabah al-khayr," "good morning," or "bonjour" (in Arabic, English and French, respectively), and other usages which are spreading in the Muslim societies that have deviated from the guidance of Islam.

This Islamic greeting is the greeting which Allaah chose for His creation from the time of Adam, to whom He taught it and commanded him to greet the angels with it. He wanted Adam's descendants in all times and places to use this greeting, because of its meaning of peace which is something most beloved by man regardless of where or when he lives. This divinely-ordained greeting is preserved nowhere except in the ummah of Islam which has adhered to the true way and has not changed it or deviated from it. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "When Allaah created Adam (may Allaah exalt his mention), He told him, `Go and greet those' - a group of angels who were sitting - `and listen to how they greet you, for it will be your greeting and that of your descendants. So he said: `al-salamu `alaykum,' and they responded, `wa `alayka al-salamu wa rahmatullah.' They added `wa rahmatullah.'"255

No wonder this form is such a blessed greeting, for it comes from Allaah, Who commanded us to adopt it as our greeting and never to replace it with anything else: “. . . But if you enter houses, salute each other - a greeting or blessing and purity as from Allaah . . .” [Quran 24:61]

Therefore Jibril (may Allaah exalt his mention) used this form of the greeting when he she used the same form in returning the greeting. This is reported in the Hadeeth from `Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her): "The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, told me: `This is Jibril who is saying salam to you.' She said, I said: `Wa `alayhi al-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu (and upon him be peace and the mercy and blessings of Allaah.)'"256

There are also rules concerning the greeting of salam, which the true Muslim tries to adhere to and apply properly in his or her own social life. These rules are summed up in the Hadeeth reported by Bukhaari and others from Abu Hurayrah may Allaah be pleased with him: "The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: `The one who is riding should say salam to the one who is walking, the one who is walking to the one who is sitting, and the smaller group to the larger group.'"257 A report narrated by Bukhaari adds the words "And the young to the old."258 The greeting is given to men and women alike, as Asma' bint Yazid (may Allaah be pleased with her) reported that the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, passed by the mosque one day when a group of women were sitting there and he waved his hand to them in greeting.259

The greeting is also to be given to children, to acquaint them with the manners of greeting and giving salam. It is reported that Anas may Allaah be pleased with him passed by some children and greeted them with salam, then said, "The Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to do that."260 When the greeting is given at night, it should be spoken softly and in a quiet voice, so that those who are awake might hear it without disturbing those who are asleep. This is what the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to do, according to the lengthy Hadeeth of al-Miqdad may Allaah be pleased with him in which he says: "We used to put aside the Prophet's share of the milk and he would come at night and greet us in such a way as not to wake those who were asleep, but those who were awake would hear it. So the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, came and greeted us as he usually did . . ."261
Salam should be given when joining a gathering and when leaving it. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "When any one of you comes to a gathering, let him say salam, and when he wants to leave, let him say salam. The former is not more important than the latter."262

The Muslim woman who is distinguished by her true Islamic manners understands the sublime teachings of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, concerning the greeting of salam and its etiquette. She follows this etiquette precisely in her private and social life, and encourages others to do likewise.

She does not enter a house other than her own without permission
The Muslim woman who is truly guided by Islam does not enter a house other than her own without seeking permission and saying salam to the people who live there. This seeking permission is a divine commandment which is not to be evaded or ignored: “O you who believe! Enter not houses other than your own, until you have asked permission and saluted those in them: that is best for you, in order that you may heed [what is seemly]. If you find no one in the house, enter not until permission is given to you: if you are asked to go back, go back: that makes for greater purity for yourselves: and Allaah knows well all that you do . . . But when the children among you come of age, let them [also] ask for permission, as do those senior to them [in age] . . .” [Quran 24:27-28, 59]

The Muslim woman should neveven think of seeking permission to enter a house that she is not permitted to enter, such as a house where there are only non-mahram men present. When she seeks permission to enter, it is to go to where there are other women or men who are permitted to see her (i.e. mahram), and no one else - in accordance with the commands of Allaah and His Messenger.

There are certain manners in seeking permission which Islam urges Muslim men and women to follow whenever they want to visit somebody:
(1) The woman who is seeking permission to enter should not stand squarely in front of the door, but to the right or left of it. This is what the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to do. `Abdullaah ibn Busr, the Companion of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "Whenever the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, came to a door seeking permission to enter, he did not stand facing it; he would stand to the right or the left. If he was given permission, he would enter, otherwise he would leave."263

The rule of seeking permission has been given to protect privacy, as Sahl ibn Sa`d may Allaah be pleased with him reported that the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "Seeking permission has been made a rule for the sake of not seeing 264. "265 Therefore the man or woman who is seeking permission is not allowed to stand facing the door, as this would allow him or her to see inside when the door is opened.

(2) She should say salam and then ask for permission. Seeking permission before saying salam is incorrect. This is the teaching of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, as given in the Hadeeth of Rib`i ibn Hirash who said: "A man of Bani `Amir told us that he had sought permto enter upon the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, who was in a house. He said, `Shall I get in?' The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, told his servant, `Go out to this person and teach him how to seek permission to enter. Tell him to say "Al-salam `alaykum, may I enter?"' The man heard, so he said `Al-salam `alaykum, may I enter?' Then the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, gave him permission and he entered."266

(3) She should identify herself clearly when asked "Who are you?" by giving her name or kunyah. She should not reply in vague terms, such as "It is me." The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, disliked such an answer from a person knocking at the door, as such words do not give a clear idea of the person's identity. He said that a person should state his or her name clearly when asking to come in. Jabir may Allaah be pleased with him said: "I came to the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, and knocked at the door. He said, `Who is this?' I answered, `Me,' and he said, `Me? Me?' as if he disliked this answer."267

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, thus taught us that the sunnah when seeking permission to enter is to state one's name clearly. This is what he and his noble companions used to do.

Abu Dharr may Allaah be pleased with him said: "I went out one night and saw the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, walking on his own. I began to walk in the shadows cast by the moonlight. He turned around and saw me, so he said, `Who is this?' and I said, `Abu Dharr.'"268

Umm Hani' (may Allaah be pleased with her) said: "I came to the Prophet's house while he was having ghusl. Fatimah was screening him and he said, `Who is this?' I said, `I am Umm Hani''"269

(4) She should go back if she is asked to do so, without getting upset or angry. This is the commandment of Allaah in the Quran: “. . . If you are asked to go back, go back: that makes for greater purity for yourselves: and Allaah knows well all that you do.” [Quran 24:28]

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, taught that permission to enter should only be sought three times, then if permission is given one may enter, otherwise one should go back. Abu Musa al-Ash`ari may Allaah be pleased with him said: "The Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: `Seek permission to enter three times, then if permission is given to you, enter, otherwise go back.'"270

Abu Moosaa once asked `Umar for permission to enter, and it was not given, so he went away. `Umar called him to come back, and they had a lengthy conversation about seeking permission and going away. It is useful to quote this conversation, to demonstrate how meticulous the Sahabah were in finding out the teachings of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, and in applying them. Abu Moosaa said: "I sought permission to enter upon `Umar three times, and permission was not given, so I went away. `Umar called me back and said: `O servant of Allaah, did you find it hard to be kept waiting at my door? You should know that people find it just as hard to be kept waiting at your door.' I said, `No, I asked permission from you three times and it was not given, so I went away [and we were commanded to do this].' He said, `From whom did you hear this?' I said, `I heard it from the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam.' He said, `Have you heard something from the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, that we have not heard? If you do not bring some evidence for this I will make an example of you.' So I went out until I came to a group of the Ansar who were sitting in the mosque. I asked them about it and they said, `Does anyone doubt you concerning this?' So I told them what `Umar had said. They said, `No one but the youngest of us will come with you.' So Abu Sa`id al-Khudri - or Abu Mas`ud - came with me to `Umar, and told him, `We went out with the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, to visit Sa`d ibn `Ubadah. When we got there, [the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam,] said salam, but no permission to enter was given.

He said salam a second and a third time, but no permission was given. He said, `We have done what we had to,' then he went away. Sa`d came after him and said, `O Messenger of Allaah, by the One Who sent you with the truth, you did not say salam but I heard you and returned the greeting, but I wanted to increase the number of times you said salam to me and my household.'"Abu Musa said: "By Allaah, I was being honest in what I reported of the words of the Messenger of Allaah. He (`Umar) said: `I agree, but I wanted to be sure.'"271

In another report narrated by Muslim, it states that when this Hadeeth was proven, `Umar rebuked himself, as it were, by saying "Was any teaching of the Messenger of Allaah hidden from me? My business in the market kept me busy."272

These are the Islamic rules and manners pertaining to seeking permission to enter a house. No doubt the true Muslim woman who is keen to follow Islamic etiquette will apply these rules in her everyday life, each time she knocks on a door to seek permission to enter, and she will also teach these manners to her sons and daughters.

She sits wherever she finds room in a gathering
Another aspect of the manners of the true Muslim woman is that she sits wherever she finds room when she joins a gathering where other women have arrived before her and found a place to sit. This is a refined social etiquette that is derived from the example, in word and deed, of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, and is a sign of good taste, sensitivity and politeness in the person who adopts it.

Such a refined Muslim woman does not force her way through the group of women who are sitting, or push them aside in order to force them to make space for her. This is in accordance with the teachings of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, which he taught his Companions to adopt when they joined his gathering.

Jabir ibn Samurah may Allaah be pleased with him said: "When we came to the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, we would sit wherever we found room."273

The well-mannered Muslim woman avoids pushing between two people, and comes between them only with their permission, if it is necessary to do so. Pushing between two people without their permission is something which the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, forbade and warned against: "It is not permitted for a man to come between two people except with their permission."274

Pushing between two people, whether in a gathering or in other circumstances, is odd behaviour Hadeeth and athar (reports) to that effect; these reports are narrated in the masculine form, as they were spoken to the men who were usually around the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, to remind them of correct Islamic manners, but these rules apply equally to women. The laws and commandments of Islam are addressed to all Muslims, and both men and women are responsiblfor obeying its commands and following its guidance.

One of these reports is that of Sa`id al-Maqbari who said: "I passed by Ibn `Umar and there was a man with him talking to him. I stood by them, and Ibn `Umar slapped my chest and said: `If you find two people talking, do not stand by them and do not sit with them, until you have asked their permission.' I said, `May Allaah guide you, O Abu `Abdul-Rahman! I only hoped to hear something good from you both.'"275

If someone gets up to let her sit in her place, she should not accept. This is better and more noble, and it is closer to the practice of the Sahabah, may Allaah be pleased with them. Ibn `Umar may Allaah be pleased with him said: "The Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: `None of you should make another get up then sit in his place.

All of you should move up and make space (for a latecomer)."276 If anyone stood up to give his place to him, Ibn `Umar would never accept it.277

On such occasions, the Muslim woman always abides by the guidance of Islam and the conduct of the Sahabah, may Allaah be pleased with them. So she attains the social manners that are encouraged by Islam, and earns the reward of Allaah for following the Sunnah of His Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam.

She does not converse privately with another woman when a third is present
Islam came to form human beings who are sensitive and civil, with an awareness and understanding of the feelings of others. Therefore Islam has set out social and moral guidelines that are at the heart of this religion, and we are commanded to follow these guidelines and apply them in our own lives. One of the guidelines laid down by the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, is that two people should not talk pbetween themselves when a third person is present: "If you are three, two should not converse privately to the exclusion of the other, until more people join you, because that will make him sad."278

The Muslim woman whose solid grounding in Islamic teaching has given her intelligence, sensitivity and good manners, avoids whispering and conversing privately when she is in a group of no more than three women. She is careful not to hurt the feelings of the third woman, lest she feel excluded and offended. If there is an urgent need for two of them to converse privately, then they must ask the permission of the third woman, speak briefly, then apologize to her.

This is the attitude of the Muslim woman who is truly guided by Islam, and this is the civil way in which she deals with other women. She learns all this from the teachings of Islam and the stories of the Sahabah, whose lives and manners were so completely permeated with the teachings and morals of Islam, that they never ignored these sensitive issues in their dealings with people. This is reflected in many reports which describe their careful respect for human feelings. An example is the report given by Imam Malik in al-Muwatta', from `Abdullaah ibn Dinar who said: "Ibn `Umar and I were at the house of Khalid ibn `Uqbah, which was in the market, when a man came in wanting to speak to him (Ibn `Umar) in private. I was the only other person present, so Ibn `Umar called another man to make our number up to four. Then he told me and the newcomer, `Move a little way off together, for I heard the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, say, "Two should not converse privately to the exclusion of another."'"279

The Muslim woman who is truly guided by the teachings of Islam and the way in which the best of generations (i.e. the Sahabah) applied them follows the example of Ibn `Umar may Allaah be pleased with him, who did not want to listen to a man who had come in off the street suddenly to converse with him in private, because he knew that there was a third person present whose feelings could be hurt if he asked him to move away on his own. He waited to listen to the man who wanted to converse in private, until he had called a fourth man, then he explained to all of them that this was the sunnah of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, and repeated the Hadeeth to them, reminding the Muslims that this is the approach they should take when they find themselves in such situations, respecting people's feelings and following the sunnah of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam. How fine are the social manners encouraged by Islam! How great is the honour which Islam bestows upon human beings and the respect and consideration it shows towards their feelings!

She respects elders and distinguished people
Islam brought a host of fine social rules which instil an attitude of chivalry, nobility, good manners and politeness in the heart of the Muslim. One of the most prominent of these teachings is to give due respect to elders and those who are deserving of respect (such as scholars, etc.) The Muslim woman who is truly guided by Islam does not neglect to follow this most essential, basic Islamic ruling, which gives the Muslim woman her genuine identity in the Islamic society. Whoever lacks this quality forfeits his or her membership in this community and no longer has the honour of belonging to the ummah of Islam, as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, stated: "He does not belong to my ummah who does not honour our elders, show compassion to our young ones, and pay due respect to our scholars."280

Respect for elders and giving them priority over those who are younger, are indications of a community's or society's level of civility, of its members' understanding of the rules of human morality, and of their high level of good manners. This is just as true of women as it is of men. Hence the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, was keen to reinforce this understanding in the hearts of the Muslims, whilst he was raising the structure of the Islamic society. Among the evidence of his concern to achieve this are his words to `Abdul-Rahman ibn Sahl, who was speaking although he was the youngest member of the delegation that had come to the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, told him, "Let someone who is older than you speak, let someone who is older than you speak." So Abdul-Rahman fell silent, and someone who was older than him spoke.281

When the modern Muslim woman shows respect to a lady who is older than her, or honours a woman who is deserving of respect, she is doing a worthwhile moral duty that in fact is a part of worship, because honouring one's elders and those who are distinguished is part of glorifying Allaah, as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "Part of glorifying Allaah is honouring the grey-haired (i.e., older) Muslim, the one who has learnt the Quran by heart without exaggerating about it or ignoring its teachings, andb honouring the just ruler."282

By behaving in this way, the Muslim woman follows the command of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, to give people their rightful positions in the Islamic society. Imam Muslim mentions this at the beginning of his Sahih, where he says: "It was reported that `Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said, `The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, ordered us to put people in their rightful positions.'"283

The Muslim woman should not forget that giving people their rightful position means recognizing their positions and giving priority to elders, scholars, those who have memorised the Quran, those who are wise and those who are distinguished, whether they are men or women.

She does not look into other people's houses
Another of the qualities of the well-mannered Muslim woman is that she does not look around the home of her host or seek to inspect its contents. This is not behaviour that befits the wise, decent Muslim woman; it is a hateful, undesirable attitude. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, warned those who let their gaze wander in gatherings and try to see things that are none of their business, and he said that it was permissible to put their eyes out: "Whoever looks into someone's home without their permission, then it is permissible for the people of the house to put their eyes out."284

She avoids yawning in a gathering as much as she can
The Muslim woman who is sensitive and well-mannered does not yawn in a gathering if she can help it. If the urge to yawn overtakes her, then she tries to resist it as much as possible. This is what the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, advised: "If any of you wantsto yawn, then let him suppress it as much as possible."285

If the urge to yawn cannot be resisted, then she should cover her mouth with her hand, as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, commanded: "If any of you yawns, let him cover his mouth with his hand so that the Shaytan does not enter."286

Yawning in front of others is unpleasant and off-putting. It does not befit the decent person. Therefore he or she must resist the urge to yawn, or at least cover his or her open mouth with his or her hand, so that the others present need not see it. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, taught the Muslims, men and women, how to behave properly in a social setting so that they will not put people off or make them feel that they are bored with them and want to leave them or want them to leave. This is the way in which the polite Muslim woman who follows Islamic etiquette conducts herself.

She follows Islamic etiquette when she sneezes
It is no secret to the Muslim woman that just as Islam has defined the manners governing the act of yawning in gatherings, it has also defined the etiquette to be observed when one sneezes. Islam teaches the Muslims, men and women, how they should behave when they sneeze, what they should say to the one who sneezes, and how they should pray for him or her.

Abu Hurayrah, may Allaah be pleased with him, said: "The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: `Allaah likes the act of sneezing and dislikes the act of yawning. When any one of you sneezes and says "al-hamdu-lillah", then he has the right to hear every Muslim say "yarhamuk Allaah." But yawning is from the Shaytan, so if any of you feels the urge to yawn, he should resist it as much as he can, for when any of you yawns, the Shaytan laughs at him."287

This simple reflex action does not occur in the Muslim's life being regulated by certain manners which make the Muslims feel, in the depths of their heart, that this religion came to reform all issues in this life, great and small like, and to give them certain words to say which would constantly connect humanity to Allaah, the Lord of the Worlds. When a Muslim woman sneezes, she should say "Al-hamdu lillah," and the one who hears her should say, "yarhamuk Allaah." Then she must respond to her sister's du`a' by saying "yahdikum Allaah wa yuslih balakum (may Allaah guide you and correct your thinking)." This is the teaching of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, according to the Hadeeth narrated by Bukhaari: "When any one of you sneezes, let him say `al-hamdu lillah,' and let his brother or companions say `yarhamuk Allaah.' And if he says `yarhamuk Allaah,' let the first one say, `yahdikum Allaah wa yuslih balakum.'"288

This du`a', yarhamuk Allaah, is said to the one who sneezes in response to his or her saying alhamdu lillah. If he or she does not say al-hamdu lillah, then there is no obligation to respond in this way. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "When any of you sneezes and praises Allaah, then respond to him [by saying yarhamuk Allaah], but if he does not praise Allaah, then do not respond to him."289

Anas may Allaah be pleased with him said: "Two men sneezed in the presence of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, and he responded to one of them and not the other. The one to whom he did not respond said, `So-and-so sneezed and you responded. I sneezed and you did not respond.' He said, `He praised Allaah, but you did not.'"290

Discussing these words which the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, encouraged the Muslims to say when someone sneezes highlights their ultimate aim, which is to mention and praise Allaah, and to strengthen the ties of brotherhood and friendship among all Muslims, men and women. The one who sneezes praises Allaah for relief from some sensitivity or irritation which he had in his nose, and the one who hears him praise Allaah prays for mercy for him, because the one who praises Allaah deserves mercy. The one who sneezes then responds with a longer and more comprehensive du`a' which is full of meanings of goodness, love and friendship. Thus Islam takes these involuntary actions of Muslims and makes them into opportunities for remembering and praising Allaah and reinforcing the feelings of brotherhood (andsisterhood), love and compassion in their hearts.

Another of the good manners to be observed when sneezing is to place one's hand over one's mouth and to make as little noise as possible. This is what the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to do. Abu Hurayrah, may Allaah be pleased with him, said, "When the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, sneezed, he used to place his hand or part of his garment over his mouth and thus reduce the noise he made."291

The well-mannered Muslim woman who is aware of Islamic etiquette does not forget, in such situations where a person may be taken by surprise, to conduct herself in the manner prescribed by the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, and to use the same words that he is reported to have used when he sneezed. This is the etiquette to be observed, in obedience to the words of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, whenever she or another person sneezes, or in response to a sister who "blesses" her (says yarhamuk Allaah) when she sneezes.

She does not seek the divorce of another woman so that she may take her place
The true Muslim woman feels that she is living in a Muslim community, whose members are her brothers and sisters. In such a divinely-guided community, cheating, deceit, treachery and all the other vile attitudes that are rampant in societies that have deviated from the guidance of Allaah, are forbidden.

One of the worst of these attitudes is that of the woman who looks at a married man with the intention of snatching him from his wife once they are divorced so that he will be all hers. The true Muslim woman is the furthest removed from this vile attitude, which the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, forbade when he forbade a numbers of other, similarly evil attitudes and practices. We see this in the Hadeeth narrated by Bukhaari and Muslim from Abu Hurayrah may Allaah be pleased with him, who said: "The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: `Do not outbid one another (in order to raise prices artificially)292; do not undercut one another293; a town-dweller should not sell something on behalf of a Bedouin294; a man should not propose to a woman to whom his brother has already proposed; a woman should not ask for the divorce of another so that she might deprive her of everything that belongs to her.295"296

According to a report narrated by Bukhaari, also from Abu Hurayrah, the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "It is not permitted for a woman to ask for her sister's divorce so that she may take everything she has, for she will have what has been decreed for her."297

The Muslim woman is the sister of another, and believes that what Allaah has decreed for her must surely happen. She cannot be a true believer unless she likes for her sister what she likes for herself, as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said:
"None of you truly believes until he likes for his brother what he likes for himself."298

The Muslim woman is protected by her knowledge and faith from falling into the trap of this sin. She is saved from such appalling error by her obedience to Allaah and His Messenger, and by her acceptance of the high human values that Islam has made part of her nature. She does not avoid this sin only to be protected from the scandal that surrounds a woman who commits such a vile deed; a woman could conceal her evil schemes and thus be spared social blame, but she can never escape the punishment of Allaah , Who knows what is secret and what is yet more hidden. [Ta-Ha 20:7]

She chooses the work that suits her feminine nature
Islam has spared women the burden of having to work to earn a living, and has made it obligatory on her father, brother, husband or other male relative to support her. So the Muslim woman does not seek work outside the home unless there is pressing financial need due to the lack of a relative or spouse to maintain her honourably, or her community needs her to work in a specialised area such as befits her feminine nature and will not compromise her honour or religion. Islam has made it obligatory for a man to spend on his family, and has given him the responsibility of earning the costs of living, so that his wife may devote herself being a wife and mother, creating a joyful and pleasant atmosphere in the home and organising and running its affairs.

This is the Islamic view of woman and the family, and this is the Islamic philosophy of marriage and family life. The Western philosophy of women's role, the home, the family and children is based on the opposite of this. When a girl reaches a certain age - usually seventeen years old - neither her father, her brother nor any of her male relatives are obliged to support her. She has to look for work to support herself, and to save whatever she can to offer to her future husband. If she gets married, she has to help her husband with the expenses of the home and children. When she gets old, if she is still able to earn, she must continue to work to earn a living, even if her children are rich.

No doubt the wise Muslim woman understands the huge difference between the position of the Muslim woman and the position of women in the West. The Muslim woman is honoured, protected, and guaranteed a decent living; the Western woman works hard and is subjected to exhaustion and humiliation, especially when she reaches old age. Since the end of the last century, Western thinkers have continually complained about the plight of Western women. They have warned their people about the impending collapse of Western civilization, due to women's going out to work, the disintegration of the family and the neglect of the children.

The great Islamic da`i Dr. Mustafa al-Siba`i, may Allaah have mercy on him, collected a number of comments by Western thinkers in his book Al-mar'ah bayna al-fiqh wa'l-qanun (Woman between fiqh and law). These comments reflect the severe anger and deep anguish felt by those thinkers when they see how low the position of women in the West has become. We wilook here at a few of these comments that give a vivid impression of the state of women in the West. The French economic philosopher Jules Simon said: "Women have started to work in textile factories and printing presses, etc. . .. The government is employing them in factories, where they may earn a few francs. But on the other hand, this has utterly destroyed the bases of family life. Yes, the husband may benefit from his wife's earnings, but apart from that, his earnings have decreased because now she is competing with him for work."

He also commented: "There are other, higher-class women, who work as book-keepers or storekeepers, or who are employed by the government in the field of education. Many of them work for the telegraph service, the post office, the railways or the Bank of France, but these positions are taking them away from their families completely."299

"A woman must remain a woman, because with this quality she can find happiness or bring it to others. Let us reform the position of women, but let us not change them. Let us beware of turning them into men, because that would make them lose much, and we would lose everything. Nature300 has done everything perfectly, so let us study it and try to improve it, and let us beware of anything that could take us away from its laws."301 The famous English writer Anna Ward said: "It is better for our daughters to work as servants in houses or like servants at home.

This is better, and less disastrous than letting them work in factories, where a girl become dirty and her life is destroyed. I wish that our country was like the lands of the Muslims, where modesty, chastity and purity are like a garment. Servants and slaves there live the best life, where they are treated like the children of the house and no-one harms their honour. Yes, it is a source of shame for England that we make our daughters examples of promiscuity by mixing so much with men. Why do we not try to pursue that which makes a girl do work that agrees with her natural temperament, by staying at home, and leaving men's work for the men, to keep her honour safe."302

The Western woman envies the Muslim woman, and wishes that she could have some of the rights, honour, protection and stability that the Muslim woman enjoys. There are many proofs of this, some of which have been quoted above (see p 86 of orig.). Another example is the comment of an Italian student of law at Oxford University, after she had heard something of the rights of women in Islam and how Islam gave women all kinds of respect by sparing her the obligation to earn a living so that she may devote herself to caring for her husband and family. This Italian girl said: "I envy the Muslim woman, and wish that I had been born in your country."303

This reality sunk into the minds of the leaders of the women's movement in the Arab world, especially those who were reasonable and fair. Salma al-Haffar al-Kazbari, who visited Europe and America more than once, commented in the Damascus newspaper al-Ayyam (September 3, 1962), in response to Professor Shafiq Jabri's remarks on the misery of the American woman in his book Ard al-sihr (The land of magic): "The well-travelled scholar noted, for example, that the Americans teach their children from a very early age to love machines and heroism in their games. He also remarked that the women have started to do men's work, in car factories and street-cleaning, and he felt sorry for the misery of the woman who spends her youth and her life doing something that does not suit her feminine nature and attitude. What Professor Jabri has to say made me feel happy, because I came back from my own trip to the United States five years ago, feeling sorry for the plight of women to which they have been drawn by the currents of blind equality. I felt sorry for their struggle to earn a living, for they have even lost their freedom, that absolute freedom for which they strived for so long.

Now they have become prisoners of machines and of time. It is too difficult to go back now, and unfortunately it is true that women have lost the dearest and best things granted to them by nature, by which I mean their femininity, and their happiness. Continuous, exhausting work has caused them to lose the small paradise which is the natural refuge of men and women alike. Children cannot grow and flourish without the presence of a woman who stays at home with them. It is in the home and in the bosom of the family that the happiness of society and individuals rests; the family is the source of inspiration, goodness and genius."

Throwing women into the battlefield of work, where they must compete with men to take their place or share their positions, when there is no need to do so and the interests of society as a whole do not require it, is indeed a grave mistake. It is a great loss that nations and peoples suffer from at times of decline, tribulation and error. The Muslim woman who is guided by the Quran and Sunnah does not accept to be thrown into that battlefield, and refuses to become some cheap commodity that is fought over by the greedy capitalists, or some gaudy doll whose company is enjoyed by immoral so-called men. She rejects, with fierce pride, that false "progress" that calls for women to come out uncovered, almost naked and adorned with make up, to work alongside men in offices. With this wise, balanced, honourable attitude, she is in fact doing a great service to her society and nation, by calling for an end to this ridiculous competition of women with men in the workplace, and the resulting corruption, neglect of the family, and waste of money. This is the best good deed a woman can do, as was reflected by the comments of the ruler of North Korea to the Women's Union conference held in his country in 1981: "We make women enter society, but the reason for that is definitely not a lack of workers. Frankly speaking, the burden borne now by the state because of women's going out is greater than any benefits that may result from women's going out to work. . .

So why do we want women to go out and be active in society? Because the main aim is to make women become revolutionary, so that they will become part of the working class through their social activity. Our party encourages women to go out and be active in revolutiwomen and making them part of the working class, no matter how great a burden this places on the state."

No doubt the truly-guided Muslim woman knows exactly where she stands when she realises the great difference between the laws of Islam and the laws of jahiliyyah. So she chooses the laws of Allaah, and does not pay any attention to the nonsense calls of jahiliyyah that come from here and there every so often: “Do they then seek a judgement of [the Days of] Ignorance? But who, for a people whose faith is assured, can give better judgement than Allaah?” [Quran 5:50]

She does not imitate men
The Muslim woman who is proud of her Islamic identity does not imitate men at all, because she knows that for a woman to imitate men, or a man to imitate women, is forbidden by Islam. The wisdom and eternal law of Allaah dictate that men have a character distinct from that of women, and vice versa. This distinction is essential for both sexes, because each of them has its own unique role to play in life. The distinction between the basic functions and roles of each sex is based on the differences in character between them; in other words, men and women have different characters and personalities. Islam put things in order when it defined the role in life of both men and women, and directed each to do that for which they were created.

Going against this divinely-ordained definition is a rebellion against the laws of nature according to which Allaah created man, and is a distortion of the sound, original nature of man. This is surely abhorrent to both sexes, and nothing is more indicative of this than the fact that women despise those effeminate men who imitate women, and men despise those coarse, rough women who act like men. The universe cannot be cultivated and populated properly, and humanity cannot achieve true happi, unless the sexes are clearly differentiated, so that each may appreciate and enjoy the unique character of the other, and both may work together to achieve those aims. For all these reasons, Islamic teachings issue a severe and clear warning to men who imitate women and women who imitate men.

Ibn `Abbas may Allaah be pleased with him said: "The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, cursed the men who act like women and the women who act like men."304 In another report, Ibn `Abbas said: "The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, cursed men who act effeminate and women who act like men, and said, `Expel them from your houses.' The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, expelled So-and-so [a man], and Abu Bakr expelled So-and-so [a woman]."305 Abu Hurayrah may Allaah be pleased with him said: "The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, cursed the man who dresses like a woman and the woman who dresses like a man."306 When the Muslims were in good shape, governed by the shari`ah of Allaah and guided by the light of Islam, there was no trace of this problem of men and women resembling one another.

But nowadays, when the light of Islam has dimmed in our societies, we find many young girls wearing tight, body-hugging trousers and unisex shirts, with uncovered heads and arms, who look like young men; and we find effeminate men, wearing chains of gold around their necks that dangle on their bare chests, and with long flowing hair that makes them look like young women. It is very difficult to tell the difference between them.

These shameful scenes, that may be seen in some Islamic countries that have been overcome by al-ghazw al-fikri (intellectual colonialism) and whose youth are spiritually defeated, are alien to the Islamic ummah and its values and customs. They have come to us from both the corrupt West and faithless East, which have been overwhelmed by waves of hippies, existentialism, frivolity and nihilism, and other deviant ideas that have misguided humanity and caused great suffering, as they have led people far away from their true, sound nature (fitrah) and distorted them, bringing the worst problems and diseases to those people as a result. We have also suffered from the fall-out of all this, which overtook the lives of men and women who deviated from the guidance of Allaah in some Muslim countries after the collapse of the khilafah and the disintegration of the ummah. Many Islamic values were lost, and these deviant men and women became alienated from the ummah, rebelling against its true, original values and distinct character.

She calls people to the truth
The true Muslim woman understands that mankind was not created in vain, but was created to fulfil a purpose, which is to worship Allaah: “I have only created Jinns and men, that they may serve Me.” [Quran 51:56] Worshipping Allaah may be done through any positive, constructive action undertaken to cultivate and populate the world, to make the word of Allaah supreme on earth, and to apply His laws in life. All of these constitute part of that truth to which Muslim men and women are required to call people. Hence the true Muslim woman is aware of her duty to call as many other women as possible to the truth in which she believes, seeking thereby the great reward which Allaah has promised those who sincerely call others to the truth, as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said to `Ali may Allaah be pleased with him: "By Allaah , if Allaah were to guide just one man through you it would be better for you than red camels."307

A good word which the Muslim woman says to other women who are careless about matters of religion, or to a woman who has deviated from the guidance of Allaah, will have an effect on them, and will come back to the sister who calls others to Allaah with a great reward that is worth more than red camels, which were the most precious and sought-after wealth among the Arabs at that time. In addition, a reward like that of the ones who are guided at her hands will also be given to her, as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "Whoever calls people to the truth will have a reward like that of those who follow him, without it detracting in the least from their reward."308

The Muslim woman does not think little of whatever knowledge she has if she is calling other women to Allaah. It is sufficient for her to convey whatever knowledge she has learned, or heard from other peoples' preaching, even if it is just one ayah from the Book of Allaah. This is what the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to tell his Companions to do: "Convey (knowledge) from me even if it is just one ayah . . ."309

This is because whether or not a person is guided may depend on just one word of this ayah which may touch her heart and ignite the spark of faith, so that her heart and her life will be illuminated with the light of guidance. The Muslim woman who is calling others to Allaah does not spare any effort in calling other women to the truth - and how great is the need for this call in these times - seeking the pleasure of Allaah and spreading awareness among those women who were not fortunate enough to receive this teaching and guidance previously, and thus proving that she likes for her sister what she likes for herself. These are the characteristics of the woman who calls others to Allaah, that distinguish her from ordinary women. They are noble, worthy characteristics that were highly praised and encouraged by the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam: "May Allaah make his face shine, the one who hears something from us and conveys it as he hears it, for perhaps the one to whom it is conveyed will understand it better than the one who conveyed it."310

The Muslim woman who is truly guided by the Quran and Sunnah is like a lighted lamp that shows travellers the way on the darkest night. She cannot conceal her light from her sisters who are stumbling in the darkness when she has seen the great reward that Allaah has prepared for true, sincere callers to the truth.

Chapter 10: The Muslim Woman and Her Community/Society - صفحة 2 2013_110

She enjoins what is good and forbids what is evil
The duty of enjoining what is good and forbidding what is evil (al-amr bi'l-ma`ruf wa'l-nahy `an almunkar) is not confined only to men; it applies equally to men and women, as is stated in the Quran: “The Believers, men and women, are protectors, one of another: they enjoin what is just, and forbid what is evil: they observe regulprayers, practice regular charity, and obey Allaah and His Messenger. On them will Allaah pour His Mercy: for Allaah is Exalted in Power, Wise.” [Quran 9:71]

Islam gave women a high social standing when it gave her this great social responsibility of enjoining what is good and forbidding what is evil. For the first time in history, women were to be the ones issuing instructions, whereas everywhere else except in Islam they had been the ones to receive instructions In response to this responsibility, which in fact is a great honour, the Muslim woman rises up to carry out the duty of enjoining what is good and forbidding what is evil, within the limits of what suits her feminine nature. Within the limits of her own specialised field, she confronts evil - which is no small matter in the world of women - whenever she sees it, and she opposes it with reason, deliberation, wisdom and a clever, good approach.

She tries to remove it with her hand, if she is able to and if doing so will not lead to worse consequences. If she cannot remove it by her actions, then she speaks out to explain what is right, and if she is not able to do so, then she opposes it in her heart, and starts to think of ways and means of opposing and eradicating it. These are the means of opposing evil that were set out by the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam: "Whoever of you sees an evil action, let him change it with his hand, and if he is not able to do so, then with his tongue, and if he is not able to do so, then with his heart - and that is the weakest of faith."311

When the alert Muslim woman undertakes this duty of enjoining what is good and forbidding what is evil, she is in effect being sincere towards her wayward or negligent Muslim sisters, for religion is sincerity (or sincere advice), as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, explained most eloquently when he summed up Islam in one word: nasihah. If that is indeed the case, then the Muslimwoman has no option but to enjoin what is good and forbid what is wrong, in order to fulfil the definition of sincerity as stated by the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam: "Religion is sincerity (nasihah)." We asked, "To whom?" He said, "To Allaah, to His Book, to His Messenger, and to the leaders of the Muslims and their common folk."312

The Muslim woman's speaking out to offer nasihah and to enjoin what is good and forbid what is evil in women's circles will lead to the correction of many unIslamic customs, traditions and habits that are prevalent among some women. How many such practices there are among women who neglect or deviate from Islam; the Muslim woman who confronts these customs and explains the correct Islamic point of view is doing the best thing she can for her society and ummah, and she is one of the best of people: A man stood up whilst the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, was on the minbar and asked: "O Messenger of Allaah, which of the people is the best?" He said, "The best of the people are those are most well-versed in Quran, those who are most pious, those who most enjoin what is good and forbid what is evil, and those who are most respectful towards their relatives."313

The alert Muslim woman is a woman with a mission. She never remains silent about falsehood or fails to uphold the truth or accepts any deviation. She always strives to benefit her sisters in the Muslim community, and save them from their own shortcomings, backwardness, ignorance and deviations. She undertakes her duty of enjoining what is good and forbidding what is evil, in obedience to the command of Allaah and His Messenger, and to protect herself from the punishment of Allaah which befalls those societies where no voice is raised to enjoin what is good and forbid what is evil.

When Abu Bakr may Allaah be pleased with him became the khalifah, he ascended the minbar, praised Allaah, then said, "O people, you recite the Ayah, “`O you who believe! Guard your own souls: if you follow [right] guidance no hurt can come to you from those who stray . . .'”[Quran 5:105] and you are misinterpreting it. Verily I heard the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, say: `Those people who see some evil and do not oppose it or seek change will shortly all be punished by Allaah.'"314

The Muslim woman who is sincere in her Islam, whose faith is strong and whose mind is open to the guidance of Islam, is always active in the cause of goodness, enjoining what is good and forbidding what is evil, offering sincere advice and reforming corrupt situations. She does not accept negativity, passiveness, negligence or vacillation in herself, and never accepts any compromise or deviance in matters of Islam and its rituals. Religion and `aqidah are serious matters; it is no joke, and it is not permitted to remain silent about any deviance or error in religious matters, otherwise we will end up like the Jews, who earned Allaah's wrath when they vacillated and became careless with regard to their religion: "Among the people who came before you, the children of Israel, if any one of them did wrong, one of them would denounce him so that he could say that he had done his duty, but the next day he would sit and eat with him as if he had never seen him do anything wrong the day before. When Allaah saw this attitude of theirs, he turned the hearts of some of them against others and cursed them by the tongue of Dawud and `Isa ibn Maryam, because they disobeyed and persisted in excesses [cf. Quran 5:78].

By the One in Whose hand is my soul, you must enjoin what is good and forbid what is evil, and you must stay the hand of the wrongdoer and give him a stern warning to adhere to the truth, otherwise Allaah will surely turn the hearts of some of you against others, and curse you as He has cursed them."315

She is wise and eloquent in her da`wah
The Muslim woman who seeks to call others to Allaah is eloquent and clever in her da`wah, speaking wisely and without being pushy to those whom she calls, and taking into account their intellectual levels and social positions. With this wise and good preaching, she is able to reach their hearts and minds, just as the Quran advises: “Invite [all] to the Way of your Lord with wisdom and beautiful preaching . . .”[Quran 16:125]

The sister who is calling others is careful not to be long-winded or boring, and she avoids overburdening her audience. She does not speak for too long, or discuss matters that are difficult to understand. She introduces the idea that she wants to convey in a brief and clear fashion, using attractive and interesting methods, and presenting the information in stages, so that her audience will understand it easily and will be eager to put their new knowledge into practice. This is what the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to do in his own preaching, as the great Sahabi `Abdullaah ibn Mas`ud may Allaah be pleased with him tells us. He used to preach a little at a time to the people, every Thursday. A man said to him, "I wish that you would teach us every day." He said, "What prevents me from doing so is the fact that I would hate to bore you. I show consideration towards you by choosing a suitable time to teach you, just as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to do with us, for fear of making us bored."316

One of the most important qualities of the wise and eloquent da`iyah is that she is gentle with the women she is calling. She is patient with the slowness or inability to understand on the part of some of them, their ignorance of many matters of religion, their repeated mistakes and their many tedious questions, following the example of the master of all those men and women who call others to the way of Allaah - the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, - who was the supreme example of patience, kindness and open-heartedness. He responded to questioners like a tolerant, caring guide and gently-correcting teacher, never frustrated by their slowness to understand, or irritated by their many questions and the need to repeat the same answers many times until they understood and left him, content with the lesson they had learned. An example of this gentle approach is the account of the Sahabi Mu`awiyah ibn al-Hakam Al-Sulami may Allaah be pleased with him, who said: "Whilst I was praying with the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, one of the men in the congsneezed, so I said, `Yarhamuk Allaah (may Allaah have mercy on you).' The people glared at me, so I said, `May my mother be bereft of me! What are you staring at me like that for?'

They began to strike their thighs with their hands, and when I realised that they were telling me to be quiet, I fell silent. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, may my father and mother be sacrificed for him, finished the prayer, and I have never seen a better teacher than he, before or since. By Allaah, he did not rebuke me or strike me or insult me. He merely said, `This prayer should contain nothing of the everyday speech of men; it is just tasbih, takbir and the recitation of Quran,' or words to that effect. I said, `O Messenger of Allaah, I am still very close to the time of jahiliyyah (i.e., I am very new in Islam). Allaah has brought us Islam, yet there are some among us who still go to soothsayers.' He said, `Never go to them.' I said, `And there are some who are superstitious.' He said, `That is just something that they imagine; it should not stop them from going ahead with their plans.'"317

Another characteristic of the successful da`iyah, and one of the most attractive and influential methods she can use, is that she does not directly confront wrongdoers with their deeds, or those who are failing with their shortcomings. Rather she is gentle in her approach when she addresses them, hinting at their wrongdoing or shortcomings indirectly rather than stating them bluntly, and asking them, gently and wisely, to rid themselves of whatever bad deeds or failings they have. She is careful not to hurt their feelings or put them off her da`wah. This wise, gentle approach is more effective in treating social ills and moral and psychological complaints, and it is the method followed by the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, as `Aa’ishah (May Allaah be pleased with her) said: "When the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, heard that someone had done something wrong, he did not say `What is wrong withso-and-so that he says (such-and-such)?' Rather, he would say, `What is wrong with some people that they say such-and-such?. . ."318

Another important feature of the da`iyah, that will guarantee her success, is that she speaks clearly to her audience and repeats her words without boring them until she is certain that they have understood and that her words have reached their hearts. This is what the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to do, as Anas may Allaah be pleased with him said: "The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to repeat things three times when he spoke, so that they would be understood. When he came to a people, he would greet them with salam three times."319

`Aa’ishah (May Allaah be pleased with her) said: "The speech of the Prophet was very clear. Everyone who heard it understood it."320

She mixes with righteous women
In her social life, the Muslim woman seeks to make friends with righteous women, so that they will be close friends and sisters to her, and she will be able to co-operate with them in righteousness, taqwa and good deeds, and in guiding and teaching other women who may have little awareness of Islam. Mixing with righteous women always brings goodness, benefits and a great reward, and deepens women's sound understanding of Islam. For this reason it was encouraged in the Quran: “And keep your soul content with those who call on their Lord morning and evening, seeking His Face, and let not your eyes pass beyond them, seeking the pomp and glitter of this Life; nor obey any whose heart We have permitted to neglect the remembrance of Us, one who follows his own desires, whose case has gone beyond all bounds.” [Quran 18:28]

The true Muslim woman only makes friends with noble, virtuous, righteous, pious women, as the poet said: "Mixing with people of noble character, you will be counted as one of them, so do not take anyone else for a friend." The true Muslim woman does not find it difficult to mix with righteous women, even if they are apparently below her own socio-economic level. What really counts is a woman's essential personality, not her physical appearance or wealth. Musa, may Allaah exalt his mention, the Prophet of Allaah, followed the righteous servant so that he might learn from him, saying with all good manners and respect: “May I follow you on the footing that you teach me something of the [Higher] Truth which you have been taught?” [Quran 18:66] When the righteous servant answered: “Verily, you will not be able to have patience with me!” [Quran 18:67] Musa said, with all politeness and respect: “You will find me, if Allaah so will, [truly] patient: nor shall I disobey you in aught.”[Quran 18:69]

When choosing friends from among the righteous women, the Muslim woman does not forget that people are like metals, some of which are precious while others are base, as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, explained when describing different types of people: "People are metals like gold and silver. The best of them at the time of Jahiliyyah will be the best of them in Islam, if they truly understand. Souls are like conscripted soldiers: if they recognise one another, they will become friends, and if they dislike one another, they will go their separate ways."321

The Muslim woman also knows from the teachings of her religion that friends are of two types: the righteous friend and the bad friend. The good friend is like the bearer of musk: when she sits with her, there is an atmosphere of relaxation, generosity, perfume and happiness. The bad friend is like the one who operates the bellows: when one sits with her, there is the heat of flames, smoke, stench and an atmosphere of gloom. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, gave the best analogy of this: "The good companion and the bad companion are like the bearer of musk and the one who pumps the bellows. With the bearer of musk, either he will give you a share, or you will buy from him, or you will smell a pleasant scent from him; but with the one who pumps the bellows, either he will burn your clothes or you will smell a foul stench from him."322

Therefore the Sahabah used to encourage one another to visit good people who would remind them of Allaah and fill their hearts with fear of Allaah , religious teaching and respect. Anas may Allaah be pleased with him reported the following incident: "Abu Bakr said to `Umar may Allaah be pleased with him, after the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, had died, `Let us go and visit Umm Ayman323 as the Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to do.' When they reached her, she wept, so they asked her, `Why do you weep? What is with Allaah is better for the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, (than this world).' She said, `I am not weeping because I do not know that what is with Allaah is better for the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam. I am weeping because the Revelation from Heaven has ceased.' She moved them deeply with these words, and they began to weep with her."324

The gatherings of righteous women, where Allaah is remembered and the conversation is serious and beneficial, are surrounded by the angels and shaded by Allaah with His mercy. In such gatherings, souls and minds are purified and refreshed. It befits righteous, believing women to increase their attendance at such gatherings and benefit from them, as this will do them good in this world and bring them a high status in the Hereafter.

She strives to reconcile between Muslim women
The Muslim community is distinguished by the fact that it is a community in which brotherhood prevails, a society that is filled with love, communication, understanding, tolerance and purity. However, it is still a human society, and as such it cannot be entirely free of occasional disputes and conflicts which may arise among its members from time to time and lead to division and a breaking of ties. But these disputes, which emerge sometimes in the Muslim community, soon disappear, because of the divine guidance that the members of this community have received, which reinforces the feelings of brotherhood, love and closeness among them, and destroys the roots of hatred and enmity, and because of the good efforts for reconciliation that Islam urges its followers to make whenever there is a dispute between close friends, where the Shaytan has caused conflict and division betweethem. We have seen above how Islam forbids two disputing Muslims to forsake one another for more than three days: "It is not permitted for a believer to forsake another for more than three days. If three days have passed, let him meet him and greet him with salam. If he returns the greeting, then they will both share in the reward, and if he does not return the greeting, then the one who initiated the greeting will be free of blame."325

Islam also commands the Muslims, men and women, to reconcile between two conflicting parties: “If two parties among the Believers fall into a quarrel, make peace between them: but if one of them transgresses beyond bounds against the other, then fight [all of you] against the one that transgresses until it complies, then make peace between them with justice, and be fair: for Allaah loves those who are fair [and just].”[Quran 49:9] The society of believing men and women should be governed by justice, love and brotherhood: “The Believers are but a single Brotherhood: so make peace and reconciliation between your two [contending] brothers; and fear Allaah, that you may receive Mercy.”[Quran 49:10]

Therefore the Muslim woman is required to reconcile between her disputing sisters, following the guidance of Islam. Islam has permitted women to add words for the purpose of bringing disputing parties together and softening stony hearts. Such comments are not considered to be the kinds of lies that are haram, and the one who says them is not regarded as a liar or a sinner. We find evidence of this in the Hadeeth of Umm Kalthum bint `Uqbah ibn Abi Mu`ayt (May Allaah be pleased with her), who said: "I heard the Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, say: `He is not a liar who reconciles between people by telling them good news or saying something good.'"326 According to a report narrated by Muslim, she added: "I did not hear him permit anything of what people might say except in three cases." She meant: war, reconciling between people, and the speech of a man to his wife or a wife to her husband.327

She mixes with other women and puts up with their insults
The active Muslim woman is a woman with a mission who has a message to deliver. Whoever undertakes this important mission should prepare herself to be patient and steadfast, and to make sacrifices along the way.

The active Muslim woman has no other choice but to put up with the bad attitude and rude reactions of some women, their misinterpretation of her aims, their mocking of her call to adhere to the morals and manners of Islam, their shallow and confused thinking, their slow response to the truth, their focus on themselves and their own interests, their concern with foolish, trivial matters, their devotion to this world and its pleasures, their failure to take the Hereafter into account or to follow the commandments of Islam, and other foolish things that may annoy the da`iyahs and make them, in moments of irritation and frustration, think of isolating themselves and keeping away from people, and abandoning their work for the sake of Allaah . This is what all those men and women who seek to call others to Allaah face in every place and time.

For this reason the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, sought to strengthen the resolve of the believers and reassure them, by announcing that those who have patience in treading the long and difficult path of da`wah are better, according to the scale of taqwa and righteous deeds, than those who have no patience: "The believer who mixes with people and bears their insults with patience is better than the one who does not mix with people or bear their insults with patience."328

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, and the other Prophets before him, represent the supreme example of patience in the face of people's misbehaviour, suspicions and foolishness. The da`i needs to hold fast to this example every time he feels his patience running out, or that he is under stress and overwhelmed by the insults and hostility of people. One example of the Prophet's supreme patience comes in a report given by Bukhaari and Muslim. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, divided some goods as he usually did, but one of the Ansar said, "By Allaah, this division was not done for the sake of Allaah." The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, heard these unjust words and was deeply offended by them. His expression changed and he became angry, but then he said, "Musa suffered worse insults than these, and he bore them with patience."

With these few words, the Prophet's anger was dispelled and his noble, forgiving heart was soothed. This is the attitude of the Prophets and the sincere da`is in every time and place: patience in the face of people's insults, suspicions and rumours. Without this patience, the da`wah could not continue and the da`is could not persevere. The clever Muslim woman who calls other to Allaah is not lacking in intelligence; she is able to understand the psychology, intellectual level and social position of her audience, and she addresses each type of woman in the way that will be most appropriate and effective.

She repays favours and is grateful for them
One of the characteristics of the true Muslim woman is that she is faithful and loyal: she appreciates favours and thanks the one who does them, following the command of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam: "Whoever has a good turn done to him should return the favour."329 "Whoever seeks refuge with Allaah , then grant him
protection . . . and whoever does you a good turn, then return the favour."330

For the alert Muslim woman, gratitude for favours is a religious matter encouraged by the teachings of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam. It is not merely the matter of social courtesy dictated by mood or whatever interests may be at stake. The one who does a favour deserves to be thanked, even if no particular interest is served by her deed. It is sufficient that she has done a favour, and for this she deserves to be sincerely thanked. This is what Islam expects of Muslim men and women. One thanks the other person for her good intentions and chivalrous motives, and for hastening to do good, regardless of the actual or potential outcome in terms of one's interests and desires. The concern of Islam to establish this attitude in the heart of the Muslim reached the extent that gratitude towards Allaah is deemed to be incomplete and imperfect without gratitude towards people for their favours and good deeds.

The one who does not thank people for their acts of kindness or find a word to say that will make them feel chivalrous, is an ungrateful wretch who does not appreciate blessings or give thanks for them. Such a one is not qualified to give thanks to Allaah, the Giver of all blessings and favours. Concerning this the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "He does not give thanks to Allaah who does not give thanks to people."331 The wise Muslim woman does not forget that thanking the one who has done a favour encourages good deeds and makes people become accustomed to acknowledging and appreciating good deeds.

All of this will strengthen the ties of friendship between the members of a community, open their hearts to love, and motivate them to do good deeds. This is what Islam aims to instil and reinforce in the Islamic society.

She visits the sick
Visiting the sick is one of the Islamic social customs that was established and encouraged by the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, who made it a duty on every Muslim man and woman, and made it a right that one Muslim may expect from another: "The rights of a Muslim over his brother are five: he should return his salam, visit the sick, attend funerals, accept invitations, and `bless' a person (by saying yarhamuk Allaah) when he sneezes."332

According to another report, the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "The rights of the Muslim over his brother are six." It was asked, "What are they?" The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "When you meet him, greet him with salam; when he invites you, accept his invitation; when he seeks your advice, advise him; when he sneezes and says alhamdu-lillah, `bless' him (by saying yarhamuk Allaah); when he is ill, visit him; and when he dies, accompany him (to his grave)." 333

When the Muslim woman visits the sick, she does not feel that she is merely doing a favour or trying to be nice; she feels that she is doing an Islamic duty that the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, urged Muslims to do: "Feed the hungry, visit the sick, and ransom the prisoners of war."334 Al-Bara' ibn `Azib may Allaah be pleased with him said: "The Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, commanded us to visit the sick, to attend funerals, to `bless' someone when he sneezes, to fulfil all oaths, to come to the aid of the oppressed, to accept invitations, and to greet everyone with salam."335

When the Muslim woman visits the sick, she does not feel that this is a burdensome duty that could depress her because of the atmosphere of gloom and despair that may surround the sick person. On the contrary, she senses a feeling of spiritual joy and satisfaction which none can feel except those who truly understand the Hadeeth which describes the goodness, reward and blessing contained in such visits. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: "Allaah will say on the Day of Resurrection: `O son of Adam, I fell ill and you did not visit Me.' He will say, `O Lord, how could I visit You when You are the Lord of the Worlds?' He will say, `Did you not know that My servant so-and-so had fallen ill, and you did not visit him? Did you not know that had you visited him, you would have found Me with him? O son of Adam, I asked you for food and you did not feed Me.' He will say, `O Lord, how could I feed you when You are the Lord of the Worlds?' He will say, `Did you not know that My servant so-and-so asked you for food, and you did not feed him? Did you not know that had you fed him you would surely have found that [i.e., the reward for doing so] with Me? O son of Adam, I asked you to give Me to drink and you did not give Me to drink.' He will say, `O Lord, how could I give You to drink when You are the Lord of the Worlds?' He will say, `My servant so-and-so asked you to give him to drink and you did not give him to drink. Had you given him to drink you would surely have found that with him.'"336

How blessed is such a visit, and how great a good deed, which aman undertakes to do for his sick brother, when by doing so he is in the presence of the Almighty Lord who witnesses his noble deed and rewards him generously for it. Is there any greater and more blessed visit which is honoured and blessed and encouraged by the Lord of Heaven and Earth? How great is the misery and loss that will befall the one who failed in this duty! How great will be his humiliation when the Almighty Lord declares, before all present: "O son of Adam, I fell ill and you did not visit Me . . . Did you not know that My servant so-and-so had fallen ill, and you did not visit him? Did you not know that had you visited him, you would have found Me with him?"

We will leave to our imagination the sense of regret, humiliation and shame that will overwhelm the man who neglected to visit his sick brother, at the time when such regret will be of no avail. The sick person in an Islamic community feels that he is not alone at his hour of need; the empathy and prayers of the people around him envelop him and alleviate his suffering. This is the pinnacle of human civility and emotion. No other nation in history has ever known such a level of emotional and social responsibility as exists in the ummah of Islam. The sick person in the West may find a hospital to admit him and a doctor to give him medicine, but rarely will he find a healing touch, compassionate word, kindly smile, sincere prayers, or true empathy.

The materialistic philosophy that has taken over Westerners' lives has extinguished the light of human emotion, destroyed brotherly feelings towards one's fellow-man, and removed any motives but materialistic ones for doing good deeds. The Westerner does not have any motive to visit the sick, unless he feels that he may gain some material benefit from this visit sooner or later. In contrast, we find that the Muslim is motivated to visit the sick in the hope of earning the reward which Allaah has prepared for the one who gets his feet dusty (i.e., goes out and about) for His sake.

There are many Hadeeth texts on this topic, which awaken feelings of brotherhood in the Muslim's heart and strongly motivate him to visit his sick brother. For example: "When the Muslim visits his (sick) Muslim brother, he will remain in the fruits of Paradise337 until he returns."338 "No Muslim visits a (sick) Muslim in the morning but seventy thousand angels will bless him until the evening, and if he visits him in the evening, seventy thousand angels will bless him until the morning, and fruits from Paradise will be his."339

With his deep insight into human psychology, the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, understood the positive impact of such visits on the sick person and his family, so he never neglected to visit the sick and speak to them the kindest words of prayer and consolation. He was the epitome of such kindness, which led him to visit a young Jewish boy who used to serve him, as Anas may Allaah be pleased with him narrated: "A young Jewish boy used to serve the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam. He fell ill, so the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, went to visit him. He sat by his head and told him, `Enter Islam.' The boy looked to his father, who was present with him. His father said, `Obey Abu'l-Qasim.' So the boy entered Islam. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, left, saying, `Praise be to Allaah, Who has saved him from the Fire."340

When visiting this sick Jewish boy, the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, did not neglect to call him to Islam, because he knew the effects his visit would have on the boy and his father, who were overwhelmed by his generosity, kindness and gentle approach. So they responded to him, this visit bore fruits of guidance, and the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, left praising Allaah that a soul had been saved from the Fire. What a great man, and what a wise and eloquent da`i the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, was! The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, was so concerned about visiting the sick that he set out principles and guidelines for so doing, which were followed by the Sahabah and recorded in the books of Sunnah.

One of these practices is to sit at the head of the sick person, as we have seen in the story of the Jewish boy, and as Ibn `Abbas may Allaah be pleased with him said: "When the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, visited a sick person, he would sit at his head then say seven times: `I ask Almighty Allaah, the Lord of the Mighty Throne, to heal you.'"341 Another of these practices is to wipe the body of the sick person with the right hand and pray for him, as `Aa’ishah, may Allaah be pleased with her, reported: "The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, used to visit some of his relatives and wipe them with his right hand, saying `O Allaah, Lord of mankind, remove the suffering. Heal for You are the Healer. There is no healing except for Your healing, the healing which leaves no trace of sickness.'"342

Ibn `Abbas may Allaah be pleased with him said: "The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, went to visit a Bedouin who was sick, and whenever he visited a sick person, he would say, `No worry, (it is) purification343, in sha Allaah."344 The Muslim woman whom Islam has filled with a sense of great humanity hastens to visit the sick whenever she hears news of someone's illness. She does not try to postpone or avoid such visits, because she feels the importance of them in the depths of her heart, as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, described it and as the virtuous early Muslim women put it into practice in the most praiseworthy fashion. They did not only visit women who were sick; they also visited men, within the framework of modesty and avoiding fitnah. In Sahih Bukhaari, it states that Umm al-Darda' visited an Ansari man who lived in the mosque (when he was sick). The same source also gives the following account: "Qutaybah told us, from Malik, from Hisham ibn `Urwah, from his father, from `Aa’ishah who said: `When the Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, came to Madinah, Abu Bakr and Bilal, may Allaah be pleased with them, fell ill. I entered upon them and said, "O my father, how are you feeling? O Bilal, how are you feeling?"'"345

The earliest Muslim women understood the meaning of visiting the sick and the role it plays in maintaining the ties of friend, compassion and affection. So they hastened to perform this noble duty, lifting the spirits of the sick person, wiping away the tears of the grief-stricken, alleviating the burden of distress, strengthening the ties of brotherhood, and consoling the distressed. The modern Muslim woman could do well to follow the example of the early Muslim women and revive this praiseworthy Sunnah.

She does not wail over the dead
The Muslim woman who knows the teachings of her religion has insight and is balanced and selfcontrolled. When she is stricken by the death of one of those whom she loves, she does not let grief make her lose her senses, as is the case with shallow, ignorant women who fall apart with grief. She bears it with patience, hoping for reward from Allaah, and follows the guidance of Islam in her behaviour at this difficult time.

She never wails over the deceased, because wailing is not an Islamic deed; it is the practice of the kuffar, and one of the customs of jahiliyyah. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, was very explicit in his emphatic prohibition of wailing, to the extent that it was regarded as kufr: "There are two qualities in people that are indicative of kufr: casting doubts on a person's lineage, and wailing over the dead."346

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, effectively excluded from the Muslim community those men and women who wail and eulogise the dead when he said: "He is not one of us who strikes his cheeks, or tears his garment, or speaks the words of jahiliyyah."347

The Muslim woman who understands the teachings of Islam knows that death is real, that everyone on this earth is mortal and that this life is merely a corridor to the Hereafter, where eternity will be in the presence of Allaah. So there is no need for this uncontrollable grief which makes a person become unbalanced and lose his reason so that he starts to strike his own face and tear his clothes, screaming with grief and loss. The Sahabah understood this ruling of Islam, even though they had only very recently left the jahiliyyah behind. They used to forbid themselves to eulogise the dead or raise their voices or scream or tear their clothes, which were actions done by women at the of jahiliyyah. They knew that Islam does not accept the deeds of jahiliyyah and will not permit them to return from time to time, and they used to condemn such actions just as the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, did. Abu Burdah ibn Abi Musa said: "Abu Moosa suffered from some pain, and fell into a coma. His head was in the lap of a woman from his family. She shouted at him, but he was not able to respond. When he came to, he said: `I shun whatever the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, shunned, for he shunned every women who raises her voice, cuts her hair and tears her clothes (at the time of disaster).'"348

Although Islam has forbidden senseless jahili actions like sticking one's cheeks, tearing one's garment, wailing and eulogising, it recognises the grief that overwhelms the heart and the tears that softly flow at the departure of a loved one. All of this is part of the legitimate human emotion and gentle compassion that Allaah has instilled in people's hearts, as was demonstrated by the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, in his words and deeds.

Usamah ibn Zayd said: "We were with the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, when one of his daughters sent for him, calling him to come and telling him that her boy - or son - was dying. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, said: `Go back to her and tell her that whatever Allaah gives and takes belongs to Him, and everything has its appointed time with Him. Tell her to have patience and to seek reward from Allaah.' The one who conveyed this message came back and said: `She swore that you should come to her.' The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, got up, as did Sa`d ibn `Ubadah and Mu`adh ibn Jabal, and I went with them. The boy was lifted up to him, and his soul was making a sound like water being poured into an empty container (i.e., the death-rattle). The Prophet's eye's filled with tears, and Sa`d said to him, `What is this, O Messenger of Allaah?' He said, `This is the compassion that Allaah has placed in the hearts of His servants, and Allaah will show compassion to those of His servants who have compassion.'"349

`Abdullaah ibn `Umar may Allaah be pleased with him said: Sa'd ibn `Ubadah fell ill with some complaint that he suffered from, and the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, came to visit him, accompanied by `Abd al-Rahman ibn `Awf, Sa`d ibn Abi Waqqas and `Abdullaah ibn Mas`ud. When he entered and found him in a coma, he asked, `Has he passed away?' They said, `No, O Messenger of Allaah.' The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, wept, and when the people saw him weeping, they wept too. He said, `Are you not listening? Allaah will not punish a man for the tears that fall from his eyes or for the grief that he feels in his heart, but He will either punish or have mercy on a man because of this,' and he pointed to his tongue."350

Anas may Allaah be pleased with him said: "The Messenger of Allaah , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, entered upon his son Ibrahim as he was surrendering his soul (i.e., dying). Tears began to well up in the Prophet's eyes. `Abd al-Rahman ibn `Awf said to him, `Even you, O Messenger of Allaah?' He said, `O Ibn `Awf, this is compassion.' Then he wept some more and said, `The eyes shed tears, and the heart feels grief, but we say only what which will please our Lord. And truly we are deeply grieved by your departure, O Ibrahim.'"351

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, approved of expressing grief by letting tears flow, because people have no power to restrain tears at times of grief, but he forbade every deed that can inflame and exacerbate grief. Shedding tears, in moderation, can help to soothe the pain of grief, but wailing, eulogising, screaming and other jahili actions only increase the anguish and make a person more prone to collapse. These actions are what the Arabs used to do at the time of jahiliyyah, when a person would even request it before his death, so that others would come and wail over the dead, enumerating his good qualities and exaggerating about the impact of this bereavement. An example of this is to be seen in the poetry of Tarafah ibn al-`Abd: "When I die, mention my qualities as befits me, and rend your garments for me, O daughter of Ma`bad. Do not make me like a man whose aspirations are not my aspirations, who could not do what I could do, or play the role I play." All of this is forbidden by Islam most emphatically, because it is a waste of energy and contradicts the acceptance of Allaah's will and decree; it also opens the way for the Shaytan to lead people astray and cause fitnah. The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, referred to this, in the Hadeeth narrated by Umm Salamah (may Allaah be pleased with her), who said: "When Abu Salamah died, I said, `He is a stranger in a strange land. I shall certainly cry over him a such a way that people will talk about it.' I prepared myself to cry over him, but a woman who was coming from the high places of Madinah to help me (in crying and wailing) was met the Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam. He asked, `Do you want to let the Shaytan enter a house from which Allaah has expelled him twice?'352 So I stopped crying, and I did not cry."353

The Prophet's concern to forbid wailing, especially among women, reached such a level that when he accepted the oath of allegiance (bay`ah) from women, he asked them to pledge to keep away from wailing. This is seen in the Hadeeth narrated by Bukhaari and Muslim from Umm `Atiyah who said: "The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, accepted the pledge of allegiance from us on the basis that we would not wail."354

According to a report narrated by Muslim also from Umm `Atiyah, she said: "When the ayah “when believing women come to you to take the oath of fealty to you, that they will not associate in worship any other thing except Allaah . . . And that they will not disobey you in any just matter . . .” [Quran 60] was revealed, she said, part of that was wailing."355

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, warned the woman who wails over the dead that if she does not repent before her own death, she will be raised on the Day of Resurrection in a most fearful state: "The woman who wails, and does not repent befoshe dies, will be raised on the Day of Resurrection wearing a shirt of tar and a garment of scabs."356

He also warned that the angels of mercy would be kept away from her, and she would be deprived of their du`a' for her, as long as she insisted on wailing and making grief worse. This is seen in the Hadeeth narrated by Ahmad: "The angels will not pray for the one who wails and laments."357

Because of this clear, definitive prohibition of wailing, screaming, eulogising, tearing one'sm garments and other jahili actions, the Muslim woman can do nothing but submit to the commands of Allaah and His Messenger, and keep away from everything that could compromise the purity of her faith in the will and decree of Allaah. She does not just stop there, however, she also calls women who may be unaware of this to obey the laws of Allaah and to keep away from wailing, once they have understood the commandments of Allaah and His Messenger.

She does not attend funerals
The Muslim woman who truly understands the teachings of Islam does not attend funerals, in obedience to the command of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, as reported by Umm `Atiyah (may Allaah be pleased with her): "We were forbidden to attend funerals, but not strictly."358

In this case, women's position is the opposite of men's position. Islam encourages men to attend funerals and to accompany the body until it is buried, but it dislikes women to do so, because their presence could result in inappropriate situations that would compromise the dignity of death and the funeral rites. Accompanying the deceased until the burial offers a great lesson to those who do it, and seeking forgiveness for the deceased, and thinking of the meaning of death that touches every living thing: Wherever you are, death will find you out, even if you are in towers built up strong and high! . . .” [Quran 4:78]

The Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, discouraged women from attending funerals (made it makruh), but did not forbid it outright, because his discouraging it should be enough to make the obedient Muslim woman refrain from doing it. This is a sign of the strength of her Islam, her sincere obedience to Allaah and His Messenger, and her willingness to adopt the attitude, which is better and more be.

Footnotes:
1. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah 13/235, Kitab al-fada'il, bab husn khalqihi , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam.
2. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Riyad al-Salihin, 336, Bab husn al-khalq.
3. Fath al-Bari, 10/456, Kitab al-adab, bab husn al-khulq; Sahih Muslim, 15/78, Kitab al-fada'il, bab kathrah haya'ihi , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam.
4. Reported by Tirmidhi, 4/249, in Abwab al-birr, 70. He said it is a hasan Hadeeth.
5. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/375, Bab sakhawah al-nafs.
6. Reported by Tirmidhi 3/244, in Abwab al-birr, bab husn al-khalq. He said it is a hasan sahih Hadeeth.
7. Reported by Tirmidhi, 2/315, in Abwab al-rida', 11. He said it is a hasan sahih Hadeeth.
8. Reported by al-Tabarani in al-Kabir, 1/181, 183. The men of its isnad are rijal al-sahih.
9. Reported by Tirmidhi, 3/245, in Abwab al-birr wa'l-silah, 61. The men of its isnad are thiqat.
10. Reported by Abu Ya'la and al-Tabarani in al-Awsat; the men of Abu Ya'la are thiqat. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/22.
11. Reported by Ahmad, 3/502; its men are thiqat.
12. Reported by Ahmad, 1/403; its men are rijal al-sahih.
13. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Riyad al-Salihin, 50, Bab al-sidq.
14. Shahadat al-zur may be interpreted in the following ways: bearing false witness by giving evidence that is false; assisting in something which implies fraud or falsehood; attending the gatherings of the kuffar on the occasion of their festivals. [Translator]
15. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Riyad al-Salihin, 689, Bab ghalaz tahrim shahadah al-zur.
16. Sahih Muslim, 2/37, Kitab al-iman, bab bayan an al-din al-nasihah.
17. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 13/92, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah, bab al-nasihah.
18. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 10/61, Kitab al-imarah wa'l-qada', bab al-ra'I mas'ul 'an ri'atihi.
19. Sahih Muslim, 13/38, Kitab al-imarah, bab fadl i'anah al-ghazi fi sabil-Allaah.
20. Sahih Muslim, 2/108, Kitab al-iman, bab qawl al-Nabi , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, man ghashshana fa laysa minna.
21. Sahih Muslim, 2/109, Kitab al-iman, bab man ghashshana fa laysa minna.
22. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 10/71-73, Kitab al-imarah wa'l-qada', bab wa'id al-ghadr; Riyad al-Salihin, 705, bab tahrim al-ghadr.
23. Fath al-Bari, 4/417, Kitab al-buyu', bab ithm man ba'a hurran.
24. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 1/74, Kitab al-iman, bab 'alamat al-nifaq.
25. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 1/72, Kitab al-iman, bab 'alamat al-nifaq.
26. Sahih Muslim, 2/48, Kitab al-iman, bab bayan khisal al-munafiq.
27. Hayat al-Sahabah 3/99.
28. Fath al-Bari, 10/476, Kitab al-adab, bab ma yukrah min al-tamaduh; Sahih Muslim, 18/126, Kitab al-zuhd, bab al-nahi 'an ifrat fi'l-madh.
29. See al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/433, Bab yuhtha fi wujuh al-maddahin.
30. Reported by Ahmad, 5/32; its isnad is sahih.
31. Hayat al-Sahabah, 3/103.
32. Fath al-bari, 13/170, Kitab al-ahkam, bab ma yukrah min thana' al-sultan.
33. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Riyad al-Salihin, 364, Kitab al-adab, bab al-haya' wa fadlulu.
34. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Riyadh al-Salihin, 363, Kitab al-adab, bab fi'l-haya' wa fadluhu.
35. Sahih Muslim, 2/7, Kitab al-iman, bab al-haya' shu'bah min al-iman.
36. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Riyad al-Salihin, 363, Kitab al-adab, bab 363.
37. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Riyad al-Salihin, 35, Bab al-sabr.
38. Sahih Muslim, 7/124, Kitab al-Zakaat, bab bayan an al-yad al-'uliya khayr min al-yad al-sufla.
39. Reported by Tirmidhi, 3/382, Abwab al-zuhd, 8; Ibn Majah, 2/1316, Kitab al-fitan, bab kaff al-lisan 'an al-fitnah.
40. Sahih Muslim, 12/10, Kitab al-aqdiyah, bab al-nahi 'an kathrah al-masa'il min ghayri hajah.
41. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/419, Bab man sami'a bi fahishah fa afshaha.
42. Reported with a sahih isnad by Abu Dawud, 4/375, Kitab al-adab, bab fi al-nahi 'an altajassus.
43. Reported with a hasan isnad by Ahmad, 5/279.
44. Reported by al-Tabarani; the men of its isnad are thiqat. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/94.
45. Sahih Muslim, 18/115, Kitab al-zuhd, bab tahrim al-riya'.
46. Sahih Muslim, 13/50, Kitab al-imarah, bab man qatila li'l-riya' wa'l-sum'ah.
47. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 10/323, Kitab al-riqaq, bab al-riya' wa'l-sam'ah.
48. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah 10/328, Kitab al-hudud, bab qat' yad al-sharif wa'l-mar'ah wa'l-shafa'ah fi'l-hadd.
49. Sahih Muslim, 16/143, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab tahrim al-zulm.
50. Sahih Muslim, 16/132, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab tahrim al-zulm.
51. Fath al-Bari, 5/97, Kitab al-muzalim, bab la yazlum al-Muslimu al-Muslima wa la yuslimuhu.
52. Fath al-Bari, 10/527, Kitab al-adab, bab al-madarah ma'a al-nas.
53. Fath al-Bari, 10/528, Kitab al-adab, bab al-madarah ma'a al-nas.
54. Sahih Muslim, 15/206, Kitab fada'il al-Sahabah, bab fada'il Umm al-Mu'minin 'A'ishah.
55. Fath al-Bari, 8/455, Kitab al-tafsir, bab law la idh sami'timuhu zann al-mu'minina wa'lmu'minat bi anfusihim khayran [al-Nur 24:12]
56. Al-Samt al-Thamin, 110; al-Isti'ab, 4/1851; al-Isabah, 8/93.
57. Al-Isabah, 8/192.
58. Reported by Tirmidhi, 4/662, Kitab sifat al-Qiyamah, 54. He said it is a hasan sahih Hadeeth.
59. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 13/109, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah, bab ma la yajuz min al-zann.
60. Hayat al-Sahabah, 2/151
61. A sahih Hadeeth narrated by Malik in al-Muwatta', 2/975, Kitab al-kalam, bab ma yu'mar bihi min al-tahaffuz fi'l-kalam.
62. Sahih Muslim, 1/73, Introduction, Bab al-nahy 'an al-Hadeeth bi kulli ma sami'a.
63. Sahih Muslim, 2/12, Kitab al-iman, bab bayan tafadul al-Islam.
64. Reported by Abu Dawud, 4/371, Kitab al-adab, bab fi'l-ghibah; Tirmidhi, 4/660, Kitab sifat alQiyamah,
51; he said it is a hasan sahih Hadeeth.
65. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 1/86, Kitab al-iman, bab al-kaba'ir.
66. Reported with a hasan isnad by Ahmad, 6/461.
67. Reported with a sahih isnad by Ahmad, 4/227.
68. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 13/147, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah, bab wa'id alnamam.
69. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 1/370, Kitab al-taharah, bab al-istitar 'inda qada' al-hajah.
70. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 1/76, Kitab al-iman, bab 'alamat al-nifaq.
71. Reported by Ahmad and al-Tabarani; the men of itsisnad are thiqat. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/64.
72. Reported by al-Tabarani; the men of its isnad are thiqat. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/64.
73. Fath al-Bari, 10/452, Kitab al-adab, bab lam yakun al-Nabi , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, fashishan wala mutafahhishan.
74. Sahih Muslim, 16/150, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab man la'anahu al-Nabi , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam.
75. Sahih Muslim, 16/135, Kitab al-birr a'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab tahrim al-zulm.
76. Sahih Muslim, 16/121, Kitab al-birr, bab tahrim zulm al-Muslim wa khadhlihi wa ihtiqarihi.
77. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Riyad al-Salihin, 340, Bab al-hilm wa'l-anah wa'l-rifq.
78. Sahih Muslim, 16/146, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab fadl al-rifq.
79. Sahih Muslim, 16/146, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab fadl al-rifq.
80. Fath al-Bari, 1/323, Kitab al-wudu', bab sabb al-ma' 'ala'l-bul fi'l-masjid.
81. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 10/67, Kitab al-imarah wa'l-qada', bab ma 'ala alwalah min al-taysir.
82. Sahih Muslim, 16/145, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab fadl al-rifq.
83. Reported by Ahmad, 6/104; the men of its isnad are rijal al-sahih.
84. Reported by Ahmad, 6/104; the men of its isnad are rijal al-sahih.
85. Reported by al-Bazzar; the men of its isnad are rijal al-sahih. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/18, bab ma ja'a fi'l-rifq.
86. Reported by Tirmidhi, 4/654, in Kitab siffah al-Qiyamah, 45; he said it is a hasan Hadeeth.
87. The word translated here as proficiency is ihsan, which also has connotations of doing well, decency, etc. [Translator]
88. Sahih Muslim, 13/106, Kitab al-sayd, bab al-amr bi ihsan al-dhabh.
89. Reported by al-Tabarani; the men of its isnad are rijal al-sahih. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/187, Bab rahmat al-nas.
90. Reported with a hasan isnad by al-Tabarani. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/187, Bab rahmat alnas.
91. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/466, Bab irham man fi'l-ard.
92. Reported by al-Tabarani; the men of its isnad are rijal al-sahih. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/186, Bab rahmat al-nas.
93. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 3/410, Kitab al-Salat, bab al-takhfif li amr yahduth.
94. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 13/34, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah, bab rahmat alwalad wa taqbilihi.
95. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 13/34, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah, bab rahmat alwalad wa taqbilihi.
96. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 2/229, Kitab al-salah, bab fadl salah al-'iswa'l-Fajr fi'l-jama'ah.
97. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 6/171, Kitab al-Zakaat, bab fadl saqi al-ma'.
98. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/472, Bab akhdh al-bayd min al-hammarah.
99. Sahih Muslim, 14/242, Kitab qatl al-hayyat wa nahwaha, bab fadl saqi al-baha'im.
100. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 6/142, Kitab al-Zakaat, bab kullu ma'ruf sadaqah.

101. From a Hadeeth whose authenticity is Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 6/145, Kitab al-Zakaat, bab kullu ma'ruf sadaqah.
102. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 6/143, Kitab al-Zakaat, bab kullu ma'ruf sadaqah.
103. Fath al-Bari, 1/53, Kitab al-iman, bab al-Muslim man salima al-Muslim min lisanihi wa yadihi.
104. Reported by Ahmad; the men of its isnad are rijal al-sahih. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/183, Bab fiman yurji khayrahu.
105. Sahih Muslim, 17/21, Kitab al-dhikr wa'l-du'a', bab fadl al-ijtima' 'ala tilawah al-Quran wa 'ala'l-dhikr.
106. Reported with a jayyid isnad by al-Tabarani in al-Awsat. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/192, Bab fadl qada' al-hawa'ij.
107. Sahih Muslim, 16/171, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab fadl izalah al-adha 'an al-tariq.
108. Sahih Muslim, 16/171, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab fadl izalah al-adha 'an al-tariq.
109. i.e., by postponing the payment, if he is the one to whom it is owed, or by paying off the debt for him. [Author]
110. Sahih Muslim, 10/227, Kitab al-musaqah wa'l-muzari'ah, bab fadl inzar al-mu'sir.
111. A hasan sahih Hadeeth, narrated by Tirmidhi, 3/590, in Kitab al-buyu', bab ma ja'a fi inzar almu'sir.
112. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Sharh al-Sunnah, 8/196, Kitab al-buyu', bab thawab man anzara mu'siran.
113. Sahih Muslim, 10/227, Kitab al-musaqah wa'l-muzari'ah, bab fadl inzar al-mu'sir.
114. Sahih Muslim, 10/225, Kitab al-musaqah wa'l-muzari'ah, bab fadl inzar al-mu'sir.
115. 'Face' here is the literal translation of the Arabic word 'wajh', which in this context may also mean the sake, cause or presence of Allaah. [Translator]
116. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 6/155, Kitab al-Zakaat, bab ma yukrah min imsak al-mal.
117. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 301, bab al-karam wa'l-jud wa'l-infaq fi wujuh alkhayr.
118. Sahih Muslim, 16/141, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab istihbab al-'afu wa'l-tawadu'.
119. Reported by Tirmidhi, 4/644, In Kitab siffat al-Qiyamah, 33. The reward for everything except the shoulder would be stored up for them in the Hereafter, as they had given it all away in charity. The part that they had kept for themselves, the shoulder, had in effect been "spent" as it carried no such reward. [Translator]
120. Fath al-Bari, 10/330, Kitab al-libas, bab al-qala'id wa'l-sakhab li'l-nisa'.
121. Fath al-Bari, 10/330, Kitab al-libas, bab al-khatim li'l-nisa'.
122. Fath al-Bari, 10/331, Kitab al-libas, bab al-qurt li'l-nisa'.
123. Sahih Muslim, 16/8, Kitab fada'il al-sahabah, bab fada'il umm al-mu'minin Zaynab.
124. Ibn Sa'd, al-Tabaqat, 8/109, 110; Sifat al-Safwah, 2/48,49; Siyar A'lam al-Nubala', 2/212.
125. Ibn al-Jawzi, Ahkam al-nisa', p. 446.
126. See Fath al-Bari, 3/283, Kitab al-Zakaat, bab ittaqu al-nar wa law bi shiqq tamarah. [Check]
127. Reported with a sahih isnad by Ahmad, 6/79.
128. Fath al-Bari, 3/293, Kitab al-Zakaat, bab man amara khadimahu bi'l-sadaqah.
129. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 6/143, Kitab al-Zakaat, bab kullu ma'rufin sadaqah.
130. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 6/142, Kitab al-Zakaat, bab kullu ma'rufin sadaqah
131. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 167, Bab mulatafah al-yatim wa'l-masakin.
132. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 13/43, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah, bab thawab kafil al-yatim.
133. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 13/45, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah, bab thawab kafil al-yatim.
134. Sahih Muslim, 2/114, Kitab al-iman, bab tahrim isbal al-izar wa'l-mann bi'l-atiyah.
135. Sahih Muslim, 1/189, Kitab al-iman, bab mubayi'ah wafd 'Abd al-Qays.
136. Fath al-Bari, 10/519, Kitab al-adab, bab al-hadhr min al-ghadab.
137. Fath al-Bari, 10/519, Kitab al-munaqib, bab siffah al-Nabi , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam,; Sahih Muslim, 15/83, Kitab al-fada'il, bab muba'idatahihi , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, li'l-atham.
138. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 3/409, Kitab al-Salat, bab al-iman yukhaffif alSalat; this version is that given by Muslim.
139. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 12/128, Kitab al-libas, bab al-tasawir; this version is that given by Muslim.
140. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 10/328, Kitab al-hudud, bab qata'yad al-sharif wa'l-mar'ah wa'l-shafa'ah fi'l-hadd..
141. Fath al-Bari, 7/141, Kitab munqib al-Ansar, bab dhikr Hind bint 'Utbah.
142. Sahih Muslim, 15/84, Kitab al-fada'il, bab muba'idatihi , sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, li'l-atham.
143. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyadh al-Salihin, 344, Bab al-'afu wa'l- 'rad 'an al-jahilin.
144. Reported by Bukhaari and Muslim with similar wording. See Fath al-Bari, 7/497, Kitab almaghazi, bab al-shat al-masmumah and 5/230, Kitab al-hibbah, bab qabul al-hadiyah min almushrikin; Sahih Muslim, 14/178, Kitab al-salam, bab al-samm.
145. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 5/150, Kitab al-da'wat, bat al-du'a li'l-kuffar bi'l-hidayah
146. Reported by Ahmad and al-Tabarani; the men of Ahmad's isnad are thiqat . See Majma'al-Zawa'id, 8/188, Bab makarim al-akhlaq.
147. Ibn'Abd al-Barr, al-Isti'ab, 4/1872; Ibn Hijr, al-Isabah, 8/127.
148. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1?342, Bab al-'afu wa'l-sufh 'an al-nas.
149. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-sunnah, 13/260, Kitab al-fada'il, bab ikhtiyarihi aysar alamrayn, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam.
150. Musnad Ahmad, 3/166.
151. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/210, Bab la yu'dhi jarahu
152. Reported by Ibn Hibban in his Sahih, 10/466, Kitab al-siyar, bab fadl al-jihad.
153. Reported by al Tabarani; the men of its isnad are thiqat. See Majma'al-Zawa'id, 8/78, Bab maja'a fi'l-hasad wa'l-zann.
154. Sahih Muslim, 14/110, Kitab al-libas wa'l-zinah,, bab al-nahy 'an al-tazwir fi'l-libas wa ghayrihi..
155. Reported by Abu Ya'la and al-Tabarani; the men of its isnad are thiqat. See Majma'al-Zawa'id, 10/125, Bab maja'a fi'l-mutan''amin wa'l-mutanatta'in.
156. Sahih Muslim, 16/184, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab idha ahabba Allaah 'abdan.
157. Sahih Muslim, 16/189, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab idha ahabba Allaah 'abdan
158. Reported with a jayyid isnad by Ahmad, 2/185.
159. Reported by Ahmad and al-Bazzar; the men of Ahmad's isnad are rijal al-sahih. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/87, Bab al-mu'min ya'laf wa yu'lif.
160. See Hayat al-Sahabah, 1/22, 23
161. Fath al-Bari, 10/471, Kitab al-adab, bab ma yajuz min ightiyab ahl al-fasad wa'l-rayab; Sahih Muslim, 16/144, Kitab al-birr wa'lsillat wa'l-adab, bab mudarah man yutqi fuhshihi.
162. Fath al-Bari, 9/175, Kitab al-nikah and 7/317, Kitab al-baghazi, bab 'ard al-insan ibnatahu 'ala ahl al-khayr
163. Sahih Muslim, 16/41, Kitab fada 'il al-Sahabah,, bab fada'il Anas. Thabit is the name of the Tabi'i who narrated this Hadeeth from Anas.
164. Sahih Muslim, 10/8, Kitab al-nikah, bab tahrim ifsha' sirr al-mar'ah.
165. Sahih Muslim, 16/177, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab istihbab talaqah al-wajh.
166. Fath al-Bari, 10/504, Kitab al-adab, bab al-tabassum wa'l-dahk; Sahih Muslim, 16/35, Kitab fada'il al-Sahabah, bab fada'il Jarir ibn 'Abdullah.
167. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/365, Bab al-mazah.
168. Nughar: a small bird, like a sparrow. [Author]
169. Nughayr: diminutive of nughar [Author]. In Arabic, this is play on words because of the rhyme between the boy's name and that of the bird [Translator]. This story was narrated in Hayat al-Sahabah, 3/149.
170. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/366, Bab al-mazah.
171. Reported by Ahmad; the men of its isnad are rijal al-sahih. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 9/368, Bab ma ja'a fi Zahir ibn Hizam.
172. Reported by Tirmidhi in al-Shama'il, 111; it is hasan because of the existence of corroborating reports.
173. A sahih Hadeeth narrated by Ahmad, 6/264 and Abu Dawud, 3/41, Kitab al-jihad, bab fi alsabaq 'ala'l-rajul.
174. Reported by Abu Ya'la; the men of its isnad are rijal al-sahih, except for Muhammad ibn 'Amr ibn 'Alqamah, whose Hadeeth is hasan. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 4/316.
175. Reported with a hasan isnad by al-Tabarani in al-Saghir. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/193, Bab fadl qada' al-hawa'ij.
176. Fath al-Bari, 9/225, Kitab al-nikah, bab al-niswah allati yahdina al-mar'ah ila zawjiha.
177. Bu'ath: a place in the environs of Madinah where war took place between the Aws and Khazraj before Islam. It was knas the battle of Bu'ath, and poets composed many verses about it. [Author]
178. Fath al-Bari, 2/440, Kitab al-'idayn, bab al-hirab wa'l-daraq yawm al-'id.
179. Fath al-Bari, 2/445, Kitab al-'idayn, bab sunnah al-'idayn li ahl al-Islam.
180. Banu Arfidah: a nickname given to Abyssinians. [Author]
181. Fath al-Bari, 2/440, Kitab al-'idayn, bab al-hirab wa'l-daraq yawm al-'id.
182. Fath al-Bari, 2/440, Kitab al-'idayn, bab al-hirab wa'l-daraq yawm al-'id.
183. Fath al-Bari, 2/440, Kitab al-'idayn, bab al-hirab wa'l-daraq yawm al-'id.
184. Fath al-Bari, 2/440, Kitab al-'idayn, bab al-hirab wa'l-daraq yawm al-'id.
185. See the reports given in Fath al-Bari, 2/444.
186. Fath al-Bari, 2/440, Kitab al-'idayn, bab al-hirab wa'l-daraq yawm al-'id.
187. Reported by Tirmidhi in Manaqib 'Umar. He said: it is a hasan sahih gharib Hadeeth; this version is gharib. See 621, Kitab al-manaqib, 18.
188. Sahih Muslim, 2/89, Kitab al-iman, bab tahrim al-kibr.
189. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyadh al-Salihin, 334, Bab tahrim al-kibr wa'l-i'jab.
190. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 12/9, Kitab al-libas, bab taqsir al-thiyab.
191. Sahih Muslim, 2/115, Kitab al-iman, bab bayan al-thalatha alladhina la yukallimuhum Allaah yawm al-Qiyamah.
192. Sahih Muslim, 16/173, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab tahrim al-kibr; also narrated by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 2/9, Bab al-kibr.
193. Narrated by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 2/7, Bab al-kibr.
194. Sahih Muslim, 16/141, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'-adab, bab istihbab al-'afu wa'l-tawadu'.
195. Sahih Muslim, 18/200, Kitab al-jannah wa siffat na'imiha wa ahliha, bab al-siffat allati yu'raf biha fi'l-dunya ahl al-jannah.
196. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyadh al-Salihin, 331, Bab al-tawadu'.
197. Fath al-Bari, 10/489, Kitab al-adab, bab al-kibr.
198. Sahih Muslim, 6/165, Kitab al-jumu'ah, bab al-ta'lim fi'l-khutbah.
199. Fath al-Bari, 5/199, Kitab al-hibbah, bab al-qalil min al-hibbah.
200. Fath al-Bari, 6/81, Kitab al-jihad, bab al-hirasah fi'l-ghazu fi sabil-Allaah.

201. Sahih Muslim, 14/64, Kitab al-libas wa'l-zinah, bab tahrim al-tabakhtur fi'l-mashi.
202. Fatawa Ibn Taymiyah, 22/138, 139.
203. Reported by al-Tabarani in al-Kabir; the men of its isnad are thiqat. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/188, Bab makarim al-akhlaq.
204. Sahih Muslim, 16/140, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab tarahum al-mu'minin wa ta'atufihim.
205. Sahih Muslim, 16/139, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab tarahum al-mu'minin wa ta'atufihim.
206. Sahih Muslim, 3/128, Kitab al-taharah, bab wujub ghusl al-rijlayn.
207. Tabaqat ibn Sa'd, 3/363.
208. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 14/312, Kitab al-riqaq, bab hifz al-lisan.
209. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyadh al-Salihin, 379, Kitab al-adab, bab ikram al-dayf.
210. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 2/207, Bab ja'izah al-dayf..
211. Reported by Imam Ahmad, 4/155; its men are rijal al-sahih.
212. Narrated by Bukhaari, Muslim and others. See al-Adab al-Mufrad, 2/210, Bab idha asbaha aldayf mahruman.
213. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 11/320, Kitab al-at'imah, bab ta'am al-ithnayn yakfi al-thalathah.
214. Sahih Muslim, 14/22, Kitab al-ashribah, bab fadilah al-mawasah fi'l-ta'am al-qalil.
215. Fath al-Bari, 8/631, Kitab al-tafsir, bab wa yu'thirun 'ala anfusihim; Sahih Muslim, 4/12, Kitab al-ashribah, bab ikram al-dayf.
216. i.e., Hatim al-Ta'iyy, as in al-'Aqad al-Farid, 1/236.
217. Fath al-Bari, 3/143, Kitab al-ja'izah, bab man ista'adda al-kafn and 4/318, Kitab al-buyu', bab al-nissaj.
218. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyadh al-Salihin, 310, Bab al-ithar wa'l-masawah.
219. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 741, Kitab al-umur al-munhi 'anha, bab tahrim al-suwar.
220. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyadh al-Salihin, 742, Kitab al-umur al-munhi 'anha, bab tahrim al-suwar.
221. Ibid.
222. Ibid.
223. Sahih Muslim, 14/81, Kitab al-libas wa'l-zinah, bab tahrim taswir al-hayawan.
224. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 744, Kitab al-umur al-munhi 'anha, bab tahrim ittikhadh al-kalb illa li sayd aw mashiyah.
225. See discussion of this deviation on pp. [ch9, love for the sake of Allaah]
226. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 788, Kitab al-umur al-munhi 'anha, bab tahrim isti'mal ina' al-dhahab wa'l-fuddah.
227. Sahih Muslim, 14/29-30, Kitab al-libas wa'l-zinah, bab tahrim isti'mal awani al-dhahab wa'lfuddah.
228. The custom at the time of the Prophet, sallallaahu `alayhi wa sallam, was for all present to eat from one dish or platter; this is still the custom in some Muslim countries [Translator].
229. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 394, Kitab adab al-ta'am, bab al-tasmiyah fi awwalihi al-hamd fi akhirihi.
230. Reported by Abu Dawud, 3/475, Kitab al-at'imah, bab al-tasmiyah; Tirmidhi, 4/288, Kitab alat'imah, bab ma ja'a fi'l-tasmiyah 'ala'l-ta'am.
231. Sahih Muslim, 13/191, Kitab al-ashribah, bab adab al-ta'am wa'l-shirab.
232. Sahih Muslim, 13/192, Kitab al-ashribah, bab adab al-ta'am wa'l-shirab.
233. Ibid.
234. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 11/385, Kitab al-ashribah, bab al-bida'ah bi'layman.
235. This was Ibn 'Abbas [Author].
236. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 11/386, Kitab al-ashribah, bab al-bida'ah bi'layman.
237. i.e., he lost his hand in the battle of Mu'tah. [Author]
238. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 399, Kitab adab al-ta'am, bab al-akl mima yalih. [?]
239. Sahih Muslim, 13/204, Kitab al-ashribah, bab istihbab la'q al-asabi'.
240. Sahih Muslim, 13/207, Kitab al-ashribah, bab istihbab la'q al-asabi'.
241. Ibid.
242. Fath al-Bari, 9/580, Kitab al-at'imah, bab ma yaqul idha faragha min ta'amihi.
243. Reported by Abu Dawud, 4/63, Kitab al-libas, chapter 1; and Tirmidhi , 5/508, Kitab alda'wat,
56. He said it is a hasan Hadeeth.
244. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 11/290, Kitab al-at'imah, bab la yu'ib al-ta'am.
245. i.e., he would pause and take a breath outside the cup. [Author]
246. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 406, Kitab adab al-ta'am, bab fi adab al-shirab.
247. Reported by Tirmidhi, 4/302, Kitab al-ashribah, 13. He said it is a hasan Hadeeth.
248. Reported by Tirmidhi, 4/304, Kitab al-ashribah, 15. He sit is a hasan sahih Hadeeth
249. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 12/260, Kitab al-isti'dhan, bab fadl al-salam.
250. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyadh al-Salihin, 437, Kitab al-salam, bab fadl al-salam; this wording is taken from a report narrated by Bukhaari.
251. Sahih Muslim, 2/35, Kitab al-iman, bab bayan annahu la yadkhul al-jannah illa al-mu'minun.
252. Reported with a jayyid isnad by Abu Dawud, 5/380, Kitab al-adab, bab fi fadl man bada'a alsalam.
253. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 2/465, Bab man kharaja yusallim wa yusallam 'alayhi.
254. The greeting should always be spoken in Arabic, regardless of whatever one's native tongue is or whatever language is being spoken at any given time. [Translator]
255. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 437, Kitab al-salam, bab fi fadl al-salam.
256. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 439, Kitab al-salam, bab kayfiyyah al-salam.
257. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 440, Kitab al-salam, bab fi adab al-salam.
258. Reported by Bukhaari. See Riyad al-Salihin, 44, Kitab al-salam, bab fi adab al-salam.
259. Reported by Tirmidhi, 5/58, in Kitab al-isti'dhan, bab ma ja'a fi'l-taslim 'ala'l-nisa'. He said it is a hasan Hadeeth.
260. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 442, Kitab al-salam, bab al-salam 'ala'l-subyan.
261. Sahih Muslim, 14/14, Kitab al-ashribah, bab ikram al-dayf. See also Riyad al-Salihin, 439.
262. Reported by Abu Dawud, 5/386, Kitab al-adab, bab fi'l-salam; Tirmidhi, 5/62, Kitab alisti'dhan, 15. Tirmidhi said it is a hasan Hadeeth.
263. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 2/513, Bab kayfa yaqum 'ind al-bab..
264. i.e., so that the one seeking permission will not see anything that the people whose house it is do not want him to see. [Translator]
265. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 445, Kitab al-salam, bab al-isti'dhan wa adabihi.
266. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 2/518, Bab idha qala: udkhul? wa lam yusallim; se also Riyad al-Salihin, 445.
267. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 447, Kitab al-salam, bab fi bayan an al-sunnah an yusammi al-musta'dhin nafsahu.
268. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 447, Kitab al-salam, bab fi bayan an al-sunnah an yusammi al-musta'dhin nafsahu.
269. Ibid.
270. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 445, Kitab al-salam, bab fi'l-isti'dhan wa adabihi.
271. Fath al-Bari, 11/26, Kitab al-isti'dhan, bab al-taslim wa'l-isti'dhan; Sahih Mu, 14/130, Kitab al-adab, bab al-isti'dhan.
272. Sahih Muslim, 14/134, Kitab al-adab, bab al-isti'dhan.
273. Reported by Abu Dawud, 5/164, in Kitab al-isti'dhan, 16, and Tirmidhi, 5/73, Kitab alisti'dhan,
29. Tirmidhi said it is a hasan sahih gharib Hadeeth.
274. Reported by Abu Dawud, 5/175, Kitab al-adab, 24, and Tirmidhi, 5/44, Kitab al-adab, 11. Tirmidhi said it is a hasan Hadeeth.
275. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad,2/580, Bab idha ra'a qawman yatanajuna fala yudkhul ma'ahum.
276. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 12/296, 297, Kitab al-isti'dhan, bab la yuqim alrajul min majlisihi idha hadara. [??]
277. Sahih Muslim, 14/161, Kitab al-salam, bab tahrim iqamah al-insan min mawdu'ihi.
278. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 13/90, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah, bab la yunaja ithnan duna al-thalith.
279. Al-Muwatta', 2/988, Kitab al-kalam (6).
280. Reported with a hasan isnad by Ahmad and altabarani. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 8/14, bab tawfir al-kabir wa rahmat al-saghir.
281. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 207, Bab tawfir al-'ulama' wa'l-kibar wa ahl alfadl.
282. A hasan Hadeeth narrated by Abu Dawud, 5/184, Kitab al-adab, 23.
283. Sahih Muslim, 1/55
284. Sahih Muslim, 14/138, Kitab al-adab, bab tahrim al-nazr fi bayt ghayrihi.
285. Fath al-Bari, 10/611, Kitab al-adab, bab idha tatha'ab fa layada' yadahu 'ala fihi; Sahih Muslim, 18/123, Kitab al-zuhd, bab kirahah al-tatha'ub.
286. Sahih Muslim, 18/122, Kitab al-zuhd, bab kirahah al-tatha'ub.
287. Fath al-Bari, 10/611, Kitab al-adab, bab idha tatha'ab fa layada' yadahu 'ala fihi
288. Fath al-Bari, 10/608, Kitab al-adab, bab idha tatha'ab fa layada' yadahu 'ala fihi
289. Sahih Muslim, 18/121, Kitab al-zuhd, bab tashmiyah al-'atish.
290. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 448, Kitab al-salam, bab istihbab tashmiyah al-atish.
291. Reported by Abu Dawud, 5/288, Kitab al-adab, 98; Tirmidhi, 5/86, Kitab al-adab, 6. Tirmidhi said it is a hasan sahih Hadeeth.
292. i.e., a person should not raise the price of something he has no intention of buying, in order to mislead another. [Author]
293. i.e., do not ask a person to return something he has bought so that you may sell him something similar for a lower price. [Author]
294. i.e., he should not act as an agent for him, controlling prices in a way that harms the community. [Author]
295. i.e., she should not ask a man to divorce his wife and marry her instead, so that she will enjoy all the comforts and good treatment that were previously enjoyed by the one who is divorced. [Author]
296. Fath al-Bari, 4/352, 353, Kitab al-buyu', bab la yabi' 'ala bay' akhihi; Sahih Muslim, 9/198, Kitab al-nikah, bab tahrim khutbah al-rajul 'ala khutbah akhihi. This version is that narrated by Muslim.
297. Fath al-Bari, 9/219, Kitab al-nikah, bab al-shurut allati la tukhall fi'l-nikah ???
298. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 13/60, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah, bab yuhibb liakhihi ma yuhibb linafsihi.
299. Al-mar'ah bayna al-fiqh wa'l-qanun, 176.
300. This is an atheistic Western expression, which refers to "nature" instead of Allaah the Creator, after the West turned its back on religion. [Author]

301. Al-mar'ah bayna al-fiqh wa'l-qanun, 178.
302. Al-mar'ah bayna al-fiqh wa'l-qanun, 179.
303. Al-mar'ah bayna al-fiqh wa'l-qanun, 181.
304. See Fath al-Bari, 10/332, Kitab al-libas, bab al-mutashabbihin bi'l-nisa' wa'l-mutashabbihat bi'l-rijal.
305. See Fath al-Bari, 10/333, Kitab al-libas, bab ikhraj al-mutashabbihin bi'l-nisa' min al-buyut.
306. A sahih Hadeeth narrated by Abu Dawud, 4/86, Kitab al-libas, 31; Ibn Hibban (13) 63, Kitab alhizr wa'l-ibahah, bab al-la'n.
307. Fath al-Bari, 7/476, Kitab al-maghazi, bab ghazwah Khaybar.
308. Sahih Muslim, 16/227, Kitab al-'ilm, bab man sanna sunnah hasanah [??]
309. Fath al-Bari, 6/496, Kitab Hadeeth al-anbiya', bab ma dhukira 'an Bani Isra'il.
310. Reported by Tirmidhi, 5/34, in Kitab al-'ilm, 7; he said it is a hasan sahih Hadeeth.
311. Sahih Muslim, 2/22, Kitab al-iman, bab bayan kawn al-nahy 'an al-munkar min al-iman.
312. Sahih Muslim, 2/37, Kitab al-iman, bab bayan an al-din nasihah.
313. Reported by Ahmad and al-Tabarani; the men of their isnads are thiqat. See Majma' al-Zawa'id, 7/263, Bab fi ahl al-ma'ruf wa ahl al-munkar.
314. Hayat al-Sahabah, 3/233.
315. Reported by al-Tabarani, 10/146; the men of its isnad are rijal al-sahih.
316. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Riyad al-Salihin, 374, Kitab al-adab, bab fi'l-wa'z wa'l-iqtisad fihi.
317. Sahih Muslim, 5/20, Kitab al-masajid, bab tahrim al-kalam fi'l-salah.
318. Hayat al-Sahabah, 3/129.
319. Fath al-Bari, 1/188, Kitab al-'ilm, bab man a'ada al-Hadeeth thalathan li yufham 'anhu.
320. Reported by Abu Dawud, 4/360, Kitab al-adab, 21; its isnad is sahih.
321. Sahih Muslim, 16/185, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab al-arwah junud mujannadah.
322. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 211, Bab ziyarat ahl al-khayr wa majalisatihim.
323. Umm Ayman was the Prophet's nursemaid during his childhood. When he grew up, he gave her her freedom and married her to Zayd ibn Harithah. He used to honour her and treat her with kindness and respect, and say, "Umm Ayman is my mother." [Author]
324. Sahih Muslim, 16/9, Kitab fada'il al-Sahabah, bab fada'il Umm Ayman.
325. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/505, Bab inna al-salam yujzi min al-sawm.
326. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 687, Kitab al-umur al-munhi 'anha, bab bayan ma yajuz min al-kadhb.
327. Sahih Muslim, 16/157, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab tahrim al-kadhb wa bayan ma yubah fihi.
328. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/478, Bab alladhi yusbir 'ala adha al-nas.
329. A hasan jayyid gharib Hadeeth narrated by Tirmidhi, 4/380, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah, 87.
330. Reported by Abu Dawud, 2/172, Kitab al-zakah; Ahmad, 2/68. Its isnad is sahih.
331. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad, 1/310, Bab man lam yashkur al-nas.
332. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 452, Bab 'iyadah al-marid.
333. Sahih Muslim, 14/143, Kitab al-salam, bab min haqq al-Muslim li'l-Muslim radd al-salam.
334. Fath al-Bari, /517, Kitab al-at'imah, bab kulu min tayyibat ma razaqnakum.
335. Bukhaari and Muslim. See Riyad al-Salihin, 451, Kitab 'iyadah al-marid, bab 'iyadah al-marid.
336. Sahih Muslim, 16/125, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab fadl 'iyadah al-marid.
337. A metaphor for the reward earned [Translator].
338. Sahih Muslim, 16/125, Kitab al-birr wa'l-silah wa'l-adab, bab fadl 'iyadah al-marid.
339. Reported by Tirmidhi, 3/292, Kitab al-jana'iz, 2. He said it is a hasan Hadeeth.
340. Fath al-Bari, 3/219, Kitab al-jana'iz, bab hal yu'rad 'ala al-sabi al-Islam?
341. Reported by Bukhaari in al-Adab al-Mufrad,1/633, Bab ayna yaq'ud al-'a'id.
342. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Riyad al-Salihin, 454, Kitab 'iyadah al-marid, bab fima yad'u bihi li'l-marid.
343. i.e., may your sickness be an expiation and cleanse you of your sins [Author].
344. Fath al-Bari, 10/118.
345. Fath al-Bari, 10/117, Kitab al-murda [?], bab 'iyadah al-nisa' al-rijal.
346. Sahih Muslim, 2/57, Kitab al-iman, bab itlaq al-kufr 'ala al-ta'an fi'l-nasab wa'l-niyahah.
347. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 5/436, Kitab al-jana'iz, bab al-nahy 'an alniyahah wa'l-nadab.
348. Sahih Muslim, 2/110, Kitab al-iman, bab tahrim darab al-khudud wa shiqq al-juyub.
349. Sahih Muslim, 6/224, 225, Kitab al-jana'iz, bab al-bika' [?] 'ala'l-mayyit.
350. (Bukhaari and Muslim), See Sharh al-Sunnah, 5/429, Kitab al-jana'iz, bab al-bika' 'ala al- mayit.
351. Reported by Bukhaari and Muslim. See Riyad al-Salihin, 463, Kitab 'iyadah al-marid, bab jawaz al-bika' 'ala al-mayit bi ghayri nadab wa la niyahah.
352. The first time was when Abu Salamah surrendered his soul (died), and some of his family were grief-stricken. The Prophet (sallallaahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) told them, "Do not pray for anything but good for yourselves, for the angels are saying 'Amin' to whatever you say," then he prayed for Abu Salamah. The second time was when Umm Salamah started telling herself that she would exaggerate in her crying for him, then she changed her mind. [Author]
353. Sahih Muslim, 6/224, Kitab al-jana'iz, bab al-bika' 'ala al-mayit.
354. Fath al-Bari, 3/176, Kitab al-jana'iz, bab ma yunha min al-nawh wa'l-bika'; Sahih Muslim,
6/237, Kitab al-jana'iz, bab tahrim al-niyahah.
355. Sahih Muslim, 6/238, Kitab l-jana'iz, bab tahrim al-niyahah.
356. Sahih Muslim, 6/235, Kitab al-jana'iz, bab tahrim al-niyahah.
357. Imam Ahmad, al-Musnad, 2/362; the men of its isnad are thiqat.
358. Fath al-Bari, 3/144, Kitab al-jana'iz, bab ittiba' al-nisa' al-jana'iz; Sahih Musli, 7/2, Kitab aljana'iz, bab nahy al-nisa' 'an ittiba' al-jana'iz.

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» Chapter 7: The Muslim Woman and Her Relatives
» Chapter 8: The Muslim Woman And Her Neighbours
» Chapter 1: The Muslim Woman and Her Rabb

IZHAR UL-HAQ

إجازة الأستاذ أحمد لبن مدير المنتدى بقراءة الإمام عاصم الكوفي

Chapter 10: The Muslim Woman and Her Community/Society